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Zoroark899's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 10/08/2010 at 9:57pm / United States (Missouri) / Work
by anonymous.. / 09/02/2010 at 8:29pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by vstan / 08/24/2010 at 8:48pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, I was mistaken for a male prostitute because I was walking home while wearing my speedo after a swim in the public pool. I was arrested and had to stay in a room full of convicts for 4 hours. Still in a speedo. FML
by xricardo / 06/04/2010 at 8:52pm / United States (Arizona) / Health
Today, I decided to apply for a credit card to help build up my credit rating. It seemed smart since I'm a 24 year old college graduate. I was rejected for not having a credit history. Being rejected turns out to hurt your credit history. The irony of my predicament is too great for words. FML
by creditwhore / 02/24/2010 at 2:13pm / United States (Missouri) / Money
by sadf4x0r / 02/24/2010 at 12:27pm / United Kingdom (Kirklees) / Love
Today, I took my cat to the vet. He said he felt a strange lump that could be serious. I got really upset and picked her up, crying. The vet then told me I had to put her down. Absolutely devastated by having to euthanize my cat, I passed out. He meant I had to put her back on the table. FML
by sadcat / 02/06/2010 at 10:19am / United States (New Hampshire) / Animals
Today, my estranged, alcoholic father decided to tell me I have a sister. After 30 mins of him describing how beautiful she is and how much we look alike and how she has lived one town away from me her entire life, I was excited to the point of tears. Too bad she died a year ago. Thanks dad. FML
by Mills / 01/18/2010 at 6:49am / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous
Today, whilst at my boyfriend's family get together, his cousin got really drunk and decided to ask my boyfriend when he was planning on proposing to me, loud enough for everyone to hear. An awkward silence was followed by my boyfriend's mother, who clearly said "hopefully never." FML
by embarrassed / 01/03/2010 at 1:53am / United Kingdom (Kent) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/31/2009 at 3:06am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, my Nana showed me her new sign that says, "Some of my greatest blessings call me Nana." We stood there looking at a wall FULL of pictures of her grandkids, which is where she wanted to hang it. After scanning the wall a couple times, I realized. There was not one picture of me. FML
by weeble_wobbles09 / 12/25/2009 at 9:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, a car was tailgating and honking at me while trying to pass me, so I decided to be a bitch back and go extremely slow. We got to a two lane road and the car passed me up. The man in the front seat flipped me off while pointing to his wife in the back seat who was clearly in labor. FML
by lois2lane / 12/23/2009 at 2:15am / United States (Texas) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 12/08/2009 at 7:10am / Norway (Rogaland) / Work
by errrmkl46 / 12/02/2009 at 1:25am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by chacha / 11/28/2009 at 1:11pm / United States / Intimacy
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…