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Zomg_Okay

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Zomg_Okay

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 January 1935 (79 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5364
  • Number of comments : 1116
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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Zomg_Okay's page activity

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Zomg_Okay's FML badges

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This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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Zomg_Okay's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home from work to my 3 year old daughter sniffing the rug in the living room. When I asked her what she was doing she said "Daddy smell this." So I went, got on my knees and bent down to smell it and she pushed my face in the dog crap smeared in the rug. FML

#18049596
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30045) - you deserved it (6797)

On 10/22/2011 at 10:06pm - kids - by me - United States (Maine)

Today, my five-year-old daughter came home from school. It was cold and she was very tired. I said, "Take off your socks and blow your nose." She took off her socks and blew her nose into them. FML

#18044688
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22673) - you deserved it (16783) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/22/2011 at 8:40am - kids - by titoutou222 - France

Today, I got into a pretty heated argument with my boss. On my way out the door I told him he would be lucky if I came back to work. Unfortunately, I left the interior light on in my truck and it drained the battery. I had to go back in and ask for a jump. FML

#18043199
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10349) - you deserved it (31437)

On 10/22/2011 at 12:55am - work - by bob - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

#18041933
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16913) - you deserved it (46042) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

#18039986
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16920) - you deserved it (30707)

On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was caught skinny dipping by the police. With the arresting officer's daughter. FML

#18035123
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39977) - you deserved it (10577)

On 10/20/2011 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by skinny dipper - United States (Washington)

Today, I called my boyfriend to see if he wanted to come over to my house. He said he couldn't because he was out of town. That would have be perfectly acceptable, if I hadn't called him on his house phone. FML

#18032391
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34725) - you deserved it (2943)

On 10/20/2011 at 5:18pm - love - by cmd102 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my parents had a fight as to which one of them is the most cultured. As a result, they've begun writing my chore lists in a variety of languages. If I don't do them, I'm grounded. I only speak English. FML

#18025150
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24667) - you deserved it (2876)

On 10/19/2011 at 6:29pm - misc - by Missy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was given an entire week of detention for planking on my school desk. FML

#18008479
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14727) - you deserved it (72281)

On 10/17/2011 at 6:05pm - misc - by planking champion (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, somebody ordered pizza and sent it to the house across the street from them, so they could shoot at the pizza guy with an air-soft gun from the upstairs of their house. I was that delivery guy. FML

#17973373
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29772) - you deserved it (1875)

On 10/13/2011 at 4:17am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, after a week of searching, I found my escaped snake. In my umbrella, outside, after opening it over my head. FML

Today, I realized just how much my bad sex life has started affecting me, when after not being able to climax from masturbating, I instinctively faked an orgasm. FML

#17786592
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30201) - you deserved it (8072)

On 09/20/2011 at 6:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML

#17775098
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22158) - you deserved it (3090)

On 09/18/2011 at 8:23pm - love - by DeadScared (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out my wife and three daughters all have their period on seperate weeks. I now have no break from yelling. FML

#17761753
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38258) - you deserved it (4593)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:39am - misc - by thedeerman (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mum yelled at me for wanting to apply to university courses that she doesn't approve of. I'm applying for Biomedical Sciences and Microbiology, she's an unemployed Jehovah's Witness. FML

#17634820
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34112) - you deserved it (2571)

On 09/01/2011 at 10:40am - work - by WhatTheFaf (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)



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