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ZombieXgirlFrend

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ZombieXgirlFrend
  • Town/Country : San Fernando, US bitches
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 July 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 302
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About ZombieXgirlFrend : Don't wake me up before 9
If you're cute and ages 15-18 text me(304-519-4307)
If you can't drive you're to young for me bro
Oh and if I don't like you, I'll tell you

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

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ZombieXgirlFrend's favorite FMLs

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

#20521872
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47777) - you deserved it (3182) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm - health - by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison (woman) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43979) - you deserved it (5787) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version

Today, at my cousin's birthday party, my grandma took me to one side, slipped me a pad, and started ranting that tampons "steal your virginity" and that I should never use them. Well, okay then. FML

#20481357
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24625) - you deserved it (1865)

On 01/27/2013 at 2:08pm - misc - by dynah114 (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML

#20456674
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44641) - you deserved it (7702)

On 01/13/2013 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Drewbie (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets. Surprisingly, it worked, and he lasted 3 times longer than usual. I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex. FML

#20452996
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42769) - you deserved it (5705)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

#20141194
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24261) - you deserved it (2421)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and I asked him to call me something sweet. He called me Honey Boo Boo. FML

Today, my husband decided that he simply couldn't exist any longer without giving me his own version of a wet-willy. He creeped up on me as I was sleeping and wiggled his wet penis around in my ear. FML

#20115322
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23468) - you deserved it (3049)

On 10/13/2012 at 5:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

#20111886
525 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71938) - you deserved it (8398)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)

Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML

#20110803
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25604) - you deserved it (4017)

On 10/10/2012 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

#20109762
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14253) - you deserved it (55655)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by cumhole (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend had a tantrum because I didn't like Black Sabbath as much as him. Apparently our entire relationship was based on him thinking I did. I've now been labeled "The Queen of Lies." FML

#20108628
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16899) - you deserved it (2550)

On 10/09/2012 at 1:39am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Tasmania)

Today, my laptop got hit by a Trojan. Not the malware, but a used condom thrown from a car driving past as I sat on a street bench. FML

#20091945
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30056) - you deserved it (2172)

On 09/28/2012 at 4:24am - intimacy - by iNearlyHurled - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that my vagina looks like Yoda. FML

#19939315
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28533) - you deserved it (4822)

On 07/15/2012 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up on my dad while he was rummaging through his briefcase. He must have heard me, because the moment I got up close, he whirled around and yelled "BOO!" causing me to scream like a little bitch. FML

#19263834
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5195) - you deserved it (23356)

On 03/12/2012 at 10:55am - misc - by gengiskarn69 (man) - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

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