Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Zoh_Aubrey

Search for a member

Zoh_Aubrey
  • Town/Country : Miami, Florida
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2782
  • Number of comments : 171
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Zoh_Aubrey : Les Twins
Doctor Who
Skyrim
Nana!

Zoh_Aubrey's last visitors

teotsiDraconicFelineCloudBustahinsomniacdreamerrelaxedninjaNarttukd1373Booda_ShunJarl_the_Elite

Zoh_Aubrey's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Zoh_Aubrey's badges

Zoh_Aubrey's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML

#19788440
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45497) - you deserved it (3026)

On 06/14/2012 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by aranya (man) - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, I went to see my dermatologist friend for a free consultation on my terrible acne. During my visit, she said I probably won't be getting any more pimples. Excited, I asked her how she could tell. She replied, "There's no more room for it." FML

#19787608
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25309) - you deserved it (2115)

On 06/14/2012 at 3:34pm - health - by ultraattitude - United States

Today, I was cashiering, and a customer's change came to $5.51. She looked pretty stinking rich, so I just gave her $5.50. She demanded the extra penny, and I asked if she really needed it. She said, "No, but they do, asshole," and dropped her $5.51 in the charity donation box. FML

#19781749
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6569) - you deserved it (94832)

On 06/13/2012 at 12:00pm - money - by ouch - United States (Florida)

Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML

#19561833
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11261) - you deserved it (38061) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/02/2012 at 1:06am - love - by Flip (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, I found out my boyfriend gave me a surprise birthday present: herpes. FML

#19556007
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34148) - you deserved it (6017)

On 04/30/2012 at 11:01pm - intimacy - by lowlife123 (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was shopping for tampons when a cute guy came over and gave me his number. He said, "Call me in 3 to 5 days." FML

#19263580
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32882) - you deserved it (5253)

On 03/12/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Tristansefam1367 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I watched Gigli. FML

#19259305
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7077) - you deserved it (23180)

On 03/11/2012 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16465) - you deserved it (28439)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16465) - you deserved it (28439)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today, the captain of my school's girls wrestling team asked me out. I politely declined. She angrily locked me in the trunk of my own car. FML

#19165097
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26801) - you deserved it (4088)

On 02/26/2012 at 1:12am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I saw a picture of my creepy uncle and me on Facebook, which he had captioned "me and my woman," and posted several lewd comments on. I guess he forgot I'm his friend on Facebook. FML

#19161997
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31660) - you deserved it (1923)

On 02/25/2012 at 4:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Virgin Islands British

Today, I found out that the money my husband and I gave to my son for university courses, has instead been spent on pole dancing lessons. FML

#19160986
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20234) - you deserved it (2398)

On 02/25/2012 at 1:40pm - kids - by jj159 (woman) - United States

Today, I noticed a flash car badly parking itself in a handicapped space. I hate the asshats who do this, so I went up to berate the driver. After an opening salvo of coarse language, a glint of light on his wheelchair in the back caught my eye. I then had to apologise for being a shitehawk. FML

#19129021
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4474) - you deserved it (33382)

On 02/21/2012 at 2:00am - misc - by Bellend (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I had to tell my 7 year old son it's not polite to jack off in public. FML

#19126066
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29458) - you deserved it (4641)

On 02/20/2012 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Gothicbunnyx3 - United States

Today, someone actually thought it was appropriate to compare my mother's death to the death of their cat. FML

#19125744
201 comments


Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: