Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Zimmington

Search for a member

Zimmington

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 December 1993 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2981
  • Number of comments : 538
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Zimmington : Booooo! I'm a ghost. Booooo!.....................................






This is the part where you run.

Zimmington's page activity

Visits<b>jazmin3012</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 5:47pm<b>RabbidIbanez</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 3:46am<b>charmedamethyst</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 4:48pm<b>theBipolarExpres</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 7:06pm<b>arianenv</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 7:48am<b>Mad_Or_Nah</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:45pm<b>annamaria55555</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 1:39am<b>noinspiration</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 6:31pm<b>aelathehuntress</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 1:27am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 5:59pm<b>Bafrinn</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 5:58pm<b>duckie227</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 5:10pm<b>Schizomaniac</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 4:29pm<b>cherrio27</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 4:03pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 5:58am<b>MichelleRuzicka</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 7:41pm<b>jjwong</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 6:52am<b>mgrazi99</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 12:37am

Zimmington's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of Zimmington's badges

Zimmington's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw my girlfriend walking hand-in-hand down the street with another man. When I confronted her, she claimed she had no idea who I was, and the guy told me to beat it. Later on, she returned to our apartment and actually tried to act as if nothing had happened. FML

#19868224
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42585) - you deserved it (2473)

On 06/29/2012 at 9:06pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML

#19867387
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20837) - you deserved it (5950)

On 06/29/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, a homeless man asked me for money in a train station bathroom. When I told him I had no money he left. He then returned only to pour a bottle full of urine on my head while I was in the stall. I use a metro card. I honestly had no money. FML

#19861588
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28815) - you deserved it (1792)

On 06/28/2012 at 5:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML

#19861407
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6187) - you deserved it (80145)

On 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm - kids - by MeanMother - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was entering a guy's number into my phone, and I couldn't remember his name. Embarrassed, I tried to be sneaky and asked, "Can you spell your name for me, please?" His name is Bob. FML

#19861298
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8841) - you deserved it (25940) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/28/2012 at 3:58pm - misc - by Bernadette (woman) -

Today, after three months of them dating, I finally met the guy my best friend claims she's in love with. To my horror, she's dating the douchebag that I had a one-night stand with a week ago. FML

#19859958
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34033) - you deserved it (6157)

On 06/28/2012 at 10:20am - intimacy - by … (woman) - United States

Today, I caught my stylist in the mirror attempting to get his colleague to laugh by spitting on my head while washing my hair. FML

#19858220
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29237) - you deserved it (1726) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/27/2012 at 10:43pm - misc - by MonCoiffeurAdoré -

Today, I discovered my children had found my vibrator and buried it in the cat's litter box. FML

#19850668
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23055) - you deserved it (11026)

On 06/26/2012 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by Heather (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a cramp while swimming. It took the lifeguard 5 minutes to stop flirting with a girl before trying to help me. FML

#19850221
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23760) - you deserved it (3087)

On 06/26/2012 at 11:08am - misc - by EdgardoP - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML

#19848843
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24451) - you deserved it (5280)

On 06/26/2012 at 2:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle. FML

#19848753
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6438) - you deserved it (46246)

On 06/26/2012 at 1:44am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I came home from a knee surgery. I asked my mother to get me a glass of water. She replied, "You can get it, you're not crippled. Oh wait, yeah you are" and laughed hysterically. FML

#19848525
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25496) - you deserved it (2599)

On 06/26/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by crippy - United States

Today, my daughter tried to sneak out of the house. When I caught her, she freaked out and punched me in the face. She then "snapped out of it" and claimed she was sleepwalking. FML

#19842330
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25273) - you deserved it (3259)

On 06/25/2012 at 12:08am - kids - by abbielane - United States (Michigan)

Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing down the highway. FML

#19829657
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7280) - you deserved it (22585)

On 06/22/2012 at 3:41pm - misc - by hakura madada - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I laughed when I shouldn't have and am probably fired. What happened? My boss asked me if birds were reptiles. I thought he was kidding. FML

#19817734
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25070) - you deserved it (3114)

On 06/20/2012 at 8:46am - work - by notanidiot - United States (Michigan)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: