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Zeus99's favorite FMLs
by awkward explanation / 06/25/2016 at 5:08pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy
by Naulwenn / 06/23/2016 at 12:25am / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/22/2016 at 6:13pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by poorbeauty / 06/10/2016 at 6:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I broke up with my fiancé after he cheated on me, and he now refuses to move out of the apartment. I'm even contemplating just offering him my Xbox One as a bribe so I can get him out of my life for good. FML
by Rari / 06/09/2016 at 12:04pm / United States (Arizona) / Love
Today, I went to get my first acupuncture. The doctor was a cute Korean woman, so I tried to start a conversation. When she pricked me with a needle near the tailbone, I involuntarily let one loose and saw her gag. FML
by Revelyn / 06/03/2016 at 6:18pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Imagino1234 / 06/02/2016 at 12:32pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by Lazyuser2849 / 06/01/2016 at 1:02am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, my husband returned from being away for two weeks. I eagerly got myself ready and sent him a risqué picture so he would come to bed. An hour later, he's on the couch playing Xbox with the message already seen. FML
by ChopSuey / 06/01/2016 at 12:02am / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to have some alone time under the stars. Things were getting hot and heavy in my truck bed and clothes went everywhere. After getting dressed, I felt pain. Little did I know that I threw my underwear in an ant pile. I got bit down south, a lot. FML
by Anonymous / 05/30/2016 at 12:35pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by tigerbyrn / 05/30/2016 at 11:35am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by halza / 05/30/2016 at 7:03am / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Love
Today, I had a mini heart attack as my dad stopped in the middle of the street and said, "I wonder what'd happen if I just dropped my pants right now and started jerking it in front of all these motherfuckers." FML
by dad, please / 05/16/2016 at 1:37am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/16/2016 at 12:48am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by sakurabloom / 05/04/2016 at 4:08pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids