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Zeus

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Zeus
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 973
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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Zeus's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that my bike was stolen. It was no big deal, my name and number was on it, but it was a crappy bike anyway. I live 3 miles away, and while I was on my walk home I noticed a bike had been thrown through my principal's window. Who's bike was it? Mine. FML

#5537780 (48)

I agree, your life sucks (26026) - you deserved it (1138)

On 09/28/2009 at 10:07pm - misc - by shield1123 - United States (Iowa)

Today, I finally found out that someone had stolen my debit card and maxed it out. The good news? Whoever it was forgot to change the address on the card, so everything they bought online has been shipped to me. The bad news? I've received 16 snuggies so far, and I'm still counting. FML

#5529870 (187)

I agree, your life sucks (34040) - you deserved it (2241)

On 09/28/2009 at 4:36pm - money - by SnuggieOverload (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, it is my wedding day. I couldn't find my very expensive wedding dress anywhere. After almost 2 hours of panic and chaos, I found it in my pool, covered in red paint, with a note on one of my lounge chairs reading, "Today is MY wedding day, bitch." FML

#5354968 (260)

I agree, your life sucks (58432) - you deserved it (2578)

On 09/19/2009 at 5:04pm - misc - by weddingcrashed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking on a busy street. I saw this beautiful blonde walking across the street and a car was coming. I wanted to be like in the movies where the guy pushes the girl out of the way so she doesn't get hit. I accidentally pushed her the wrong way. Right into the car. FML

#5107087 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (8695) - you deserved it (52418)

On 09/07/2009 at 3:21pm - misc - by ilovefootball (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, there were some wasps getting in my bedroom from a hole in the frame of my window. I went outside with some spray and took out their entrance. What I didnt know is that when you spray wasps, they go the other direction. I now have 60+ wasps flying around my bedroom. FML

#4608899 (101)

I agree, your life sucks (25039) - you deserved it (16356)

On 08/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by BearGrillz - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I slept in late and when I woke up, thought I was the only one in the house so I decided to walk around the corner to the only upstairs bathroom naked. My dad also slept in, also thought he was the only one in the house, and also decided to walk to the bathroom naked. We collided. FML

#4596913 (201)

I agree, your life sucks (51010) - you deserved it (9643)

On 08/17/2009 at 9:50am - misc - by malebonding (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my mom was gifted with a toiletry basket. I grabbed the lotion and used it without asking. When I went out, it began raining hard. I got wet and noticed my skin got very sticky. Turns out the lotion was actually body wash. People were wondering why soap bubbles were coming from my skin. FML

#4499935 (125)

I agree, your life sucks (5210) - you deserved it (42366)

On 08/13/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by soapgirl (woman) - Philippines (Pampanga)

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

#4330249 (361)

I agree, your life sucks (70090) - you deserved it (14844)

On 08/06/2009 at 7:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was working the lighting for a drama production. In the last scene, two characters realize they are in love and kiss, then the stage goes dark. I mixed up my settings, and instead of a blackout, flashing party lights started going off. 300 people turn around to stare at me. FML

#4285773 (130)

I agree, your life sucks (11408) - you deserved it (24817)

On 08/04/2009 at 4:22pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of random names she thought of, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML

#4201087 (417)

I agree, your life sucks (56822) - you deserved it (11486)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:44am - love - by NinjaPanda88 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I brought my lunch to work in the only box I had lying around my apartment - a small one from FedEx. When I went to the bathroom before lunch, I returned to my desk to find that one of my coworkers had mailed my lunch back to my apartment. FML

#4081903 (120)

I agree, your life sucks (33471) - you deserved it (6629)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:12pm - work - by fedexed (man) - United States (California)

Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I am so hot, I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply "I didn't know you were into Pokémon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokémon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML

#3971030 (323)

I agree, your life sucks (13063) - you deserved it (53421)

On 07/23/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by MitchFail (man) - United States

Today, I got home and threw my phone onto my bed as usual. This time it bounced out the window. FML

#3663741 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (34726) - you deserved it (19693)

On 07/11/2009 at 9:48am - misc - by jadakorn (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was involved in a car accident. I wasn't the driver of either car. I happened to be a passerby that was hit by a falling stop sign as a car hit it. FML

#3660807 (101)

I agree, your life sucks (43714) - you deserved it (1603)

On 07/11/2009 at 3:43am - misc - by ttsutaoka (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went with my sister to get our eyebrows waxed. I didn't think my eyebrows were that bad--and they weren't! When the guy waxed my eyebrows, he gestured my lips and said, "Moustache, too?" Mortified, I said, "No!" to which he replied, "Aw, someone no get kissy tonight." FML

#3658638 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (32543) - you deserved it (6467)

On 07/11/2009 at 1:58am - misc - by RR (woman) - United States (New York)



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