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Zaros

Offline (17 hours ago) | Search for a member

Zaros

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 17 August 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2325
  • Number of comments : 151
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About Zaros : I was brutally attacked by my razor. Currently in the process of regrowing my mutton chops.

If you want my snapchat or Facebook feel free to ask so I can tell you no personally.

Zaros's page activity

Visits<b>sammy1021</b> - 14 hours ago<b>lisaint</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 2:47pm<b>Rinkster315</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 4:10pm<b>adoseofmicki</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 8:21pm<b>randomgirl1234</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 4:30am<b>cherrio27</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 11:43pm<b>coried91</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 1:00pm<b>Roaryah</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 1:31pm<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 1:57pm<b>totallybananas</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 3:59am<b>LittleBells</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 9:13pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 1:47am<b>C00kiesNcream</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 3:52pm<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 7:48pm<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 6:53pm<b>fuckercakes</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 11:24pm<b>_Breezie_</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 10:14pm<b>useless_reject</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 5:44pm

Zaros's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of Zaros's badges

Zaros's favorite FMLs

Today, after sex, my boyfriend and I lay in bed for a couple of hours just chatting. This would have been lovely. However, his topic of choice for post-coital pillow talk was his theory about how Chewbacca is secretly the leader of the Rebel Alliance. It actually made sense. FML

#20020311
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24280) - you deserved it (6885)

On 08/14/2012 at 8:17am - intimacy - by cl4ptp (woman) - United Kingdom (Vale of Glamorgan, The)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10719) - you deserved it (36837)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, my dog was licking the dishes in the dishwasher when his collar got stuck on it. Then he got scared of the dishwasher rack following him and ran away really fast. Now I have no dishes. FML

Today, I walked in on my wife masturbating. Naturally, I asked her if she needed some help. She replied, "Nah, I've got this." FML

#19783126
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26017) - you deserved it (15492)

On 06/13/2012 at 5:30pm - intimacy - by Steve (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I wore my new Brazilian thong bikini to the pool for the first time. I was lying face down feeling so sexy, until flies started buzzing my butt. FML

#19344343
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8854) - you deserved it (32762)

On 03/25/2012 at 11:34am - misc - by BookBabe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that when my girlfriend said she gave up sex for lent, it was just with me and not my brother. FML

#19343817
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37579) - you deserved it (2483)

On 03/25/2012 at 9:11am - intimacy - by ohno - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I started my research project on horror stories and people's fascination with them. I did some research and wound up reading H.P. Lovecraft. On the upside, I can now pee more easily. On the downside, it's likely to be in my pants. FML

#19340135
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15330) - you deserved it (3780)

On 03/24/2012 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, a client shouted at me over something that had nothing to do with me. She put such effort into shouting that she farted in my office. FML

#19331410
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22026) - you deserved it (1753)

On 03/23/2012 at 5:44am - work - by ANNIEDBD - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML

#17911621
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25295) - you deserved it (19947)

On 10/05/2011 at 2:58pm - animals - by Beeisc00l - Reserved

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

#17448380
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25934) - you deserved it (2538)

On 08/12/2011 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML

#17388195
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23301) - you deserved it (5618)

On 08/06/2011 at 3:10pm - misc - by lostforwords (woman) - Ireland (Tipperary)

Today, I learned the hard way that yes, a fork can get stuck in your braces. FML

#16601397
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27707) - you deserved it (15029)

On 06/10/2011 at 9:32pm - health - by 8sq (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, thinking "wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized that I'd been watching my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes. FML

#15762337
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17695) - you deserved it (36477)

On 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm - animals - by Anonymous -

Today, I got into a wreck thanks to a big flashing sign on the highway that said "Keep your eyes on the road" that distracted me. FML

#15445507
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30224) - you deserved it (15559)

On 03/23/2011 at 7:25am - misc - by cupcakelady127 (woman) - United States

Today, I was driving with my mother. The ride was 2 hours long. For the first hour, she talked about how uncomfortable sex is the first time. For the second, she talked about how I should take accordion lessons. FML

#14991299
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30057) - you deserved it (2982)

On 02/15/2011 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by bitchasaurusrex (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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