Zaros

Search for a member

Offline (the 04/29/2016 at 8:58pm)

Zaros

13Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 17 August 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4205
  • Number of comments : 152
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About Zaros : I was brutally attacked by my razor. Currently in the process of regrowing my mutton chops.

If you want my snapchat or Facebook feel free to ask so I can tell you no personally.

Zaros's page activity

Visits<b>slappygecko</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 9:49pm<b>___Unknown__08</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 8:05am<b>Reedus123</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 6:45am<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 1:59pm<b>missmum2010</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 10:31pm<b>A_Clark1328</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 3:00pm<b>madissin</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 11:53am<b>vampyrate3562</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 12:18am<b>lilo16</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 11:45pm<b>RealChewyPiano</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 8:14pm<b>kowsee</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 5:40pm<b>MajorLAZ0R</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 7:17pm<b>BonerFart</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 6:14pm<b>kkorn051212</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 11:18pm<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 7:37pm<b>SadIndianLife</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 1:46am<b>pd2902</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 9:21pm<b>commanderstiff</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 8:05pm

Fucked!<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 1:37am<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 2:10am<b>sallycinnamon</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 11:56pm<b>whitnayfortooh</b> - the 08/02/2015 at 1:27pm<b>Zeuszara</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 11:27am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 9:51am<b>leahb99</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 11:17pm<b>sarah5745</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 12:20am<b>ariastyles12</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 5:54pm<b>YouHaveANiceButt</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 6:28am<b>_Breezie_</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 9:13pm<b>Colethebull</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 1:39pm

Zaros's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Zaros's badges

Zaros's favorite FMLs

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

by HappilyNeverAfter / 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I managed to punch a customer's child as he walked around the corner just as I enthusiastically pointed his mother in the direction of what she was looking for. FML

by Anonymous / 07/23/2014 at 12:04am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, as I was on the couch taking a nap, it started violently shaking. I panicked and chased my family outside, convinced it was an earthquake. It was just the cat trapped inside the couch. FML

by murrrrf / 07/21/2014 at 1:30am / United States (Missouri) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I introduced my dad, who is a surgeon, to the TV show House. I thought it'd be a good bonding experience. How wrong I was. He spent the whole time yelling about the "insane" medical inaccuracies, then lectured me about my crappy taste in TV. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2013 at 3:11pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I heard crashing noises coming from my dining room. I got up to see what it was; my asshat cat was flinging himself at my chandelier. He'd figured out how to grab the ceiling fan from the other room, build momentum, and launch into my expensive chandelier. Hooray. FML

by IamAflyingCat / 10/22/2013 at 5:12am / United States / Animals

Today, the family upstairs decided to play basketball. Indoors. At 3am. FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2013 at 9:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my father was taking pictures of my friend and me as we got ready for homecoming. After the pictures were taken, he offered to show us. He scrolled one picture too far and ended up showing us a picture of his penis. FML

by Female_Lucifer / 10/20/2013 at 9:02am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I slept over at my friend's house. Her dad made breakfast for us. While fixing a plate, my friend said, "Careful, my dad clips his nails in the kitchen." She said it with a sarcastic, joking tone, and laughed afterwards. While eating, I found a toenail in my food. Her response? "I told you." FML

by sleepysophie / 10/19/2013 at 11:04am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up and found $30 slipped under my door with a note that read, "Please buy yourself a quieter vibrator. -Mom and Dad." FML

by anon / 09/09/2013 at 11:15am / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML

by Anonymous / 09/08/2013 at 12:38pm / Switzerland (Bern) / Work

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

by Thanks everyone / 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I had sex. The guy texted me an hour later, saying, "That was awkward. Let's not do that again." FML

by none / 08/22/2013 at 12:27am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I met the most beautiful girl I've ever seen on the beach. I was nervous, but I just smiled and said, "Hey, you're really pretty." Then I let out a horrific fart. FML

by YouSoSmelly / 08/02/2013 at 9:58am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, while taking a walk in the forest, someone approached me and asked to borrow the knife I had clipped to my pocket. I happily obliged, assuming he just needed it as a tool. Instead, he used the knife to mug me, taking my cellphone and my wallet. I was robbed with my own knife. FML

by vmml97 / 08/01/2013 at 12:32am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.