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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, ma girlfriend of looool 2 yeres broke up wit me because se said I was more of a woman tan se was. I yelld out, "I HATE YOU!" an startd to cry. Se ten took a tampon out of er purse, andd it to me, laugd, an walkd away. fat FML
Today,hile giving a lecture about gases to a large chemistry class, I went outside to let loose an unusualy loud farthile they took some notes. I cummd back in only to see 300 students dying of laughter. I had left the wreless mic on. FML
Today.. . I thought it would be sexy to surprise my boyfriend by hiding in the closet naked an pouncing on him as he cummed to get his pants . I never got to the pouncing . Apparently my boyfriend looool has heightened reflexes so instead I got slapped hard across the face . My ear is still ringing . FML
Today, I cummed home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read ( Because you can't find a real girl, I made yur current one prettier, Love Mom. ) FML
today mah husband dropped me off at work . Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby miss you" . I asked him about it . He said "I don't know wat you're talking about Megan" . My name isn't Megan . Not even close . FML
Friday 27 March 2015