YakuzaxGeneralz

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YakuzaxGeneralz

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 September 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4952
  • Number of comments : 137
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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YakuzaxGeneralz's page activity

Visits<b>weedle99</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 11:19pm<b>RayRayYoooo</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 11:39pm<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 10:28am<b>DaEpicTaco</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 4:44pm<b>CyanideCyan</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 4:14am<b>choochee02</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 1:07pm<b>Soccerboi15</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 3:38am<b>ilovesoccer1610</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 8:18pm<b>dumpless</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 5:38pm<b>owlicioua</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 12:43pm<b>WaltzingPhanthom</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 9:49pm<b>ashcroft97</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 10:00am<b>mrlawlor7777</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 3:18am<b>tepovre</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 9:57pm<b>CheeseTacos</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 12:10am<b>hailstorm187</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 9:45pm<b>awesomeamandas</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 3:29am<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 1:08am

Fucked!<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 4:29pm

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YakuzaxGeneralz's favorite FMLs

Today, for April fools I decided to set off the smoke detectors in my friend's apartment while he was sleeping and saran wrap the outside of his bedroom doorway so he would smack into it. Instead, he jumped out the window and broke his leg. FML

by nic / 04/01/2009 at 4:06pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I was talking to my guy friend about prom. I told him I was turned down by 7 guys. So he said "Well, you could always ask me." I then said "Do you want to go to prom with me?" His response was "Nope...now that's 8!" FML

by rejected / 03/27/2009 at 8:38pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I was going down on my girlfriend when I noticed a hickey near her hip. I said, "wow, last night was crazy, I don't even remember doing that!". Without even interrupting the action, she simply said, "You didn't". FML

by tehhotness / 03/27/2009 at 10:13am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking downtown when a bum approached me for some change. I planned to give a couple dollars but after pulling out my wallet exposing my cash, the bum beat me unconscious. The bum is a 5'0" tall woman; I'm a 6'2" male out $200. FML

by dude / 03/24/2009 at 4:52pm / United States (Tennessee) / Money

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 12:46am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I was walking through Macy's with my girlfriend. I stopped to admire a mannequin's ass, joking with my girlfriend like I was touching it. Then I slapped it. It wasn't a mannequin. FML

by Noname / 03/17/2009 at 6:16am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to prove to my dad that he snores by secretly putting a tape recorder under his bed. I soon found out my parents had sex that night. Apparently, my mom likes to talk dirty. FML

by Zack / 03/11/2009 at 2:57pm / Israel (Tel Aviv) / Intimacy

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

by Señor Guapo / 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML

by Noname / 02/26/2009 at 10:30am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML

by Noname / 02/26/2009 at 10:30am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML

by Noname / 02/26/2009 at 10:30am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I drove to a party after getting my car back from the shop. A thunderstorm started as I made my way there and upon arriving, the power went out. The guests decided to watch the storm from the front windows when someone mentioned how funny it would be if a tree fell on my car. Seconds later, one did. FML

by Jessie / 02/23/2009 at 3:08am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, while working on a carpentry project with my friend at 2am, and enjoying some beers, I cut my hand and realized I needed medical attention. Neither of us being in driving shape, I knocked on my parents bedroom door to request a ride. I was told I had to wait for them to "finish." FML

by Whothrewhim / 02/21/2009 at 7:39pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was talking to my parents about feeling insecure with my "beach body" as Spring Break keeps getting closer and closer. My dad warned me by saying, "Don't wear a gray swimsuit. People will try to roll you back into the ocean". FML

by Shamu / 02/13/2009 at 7:15pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I fell asleep. I felt something on my face. I batted it away. It was my hamster. It died from a concussion upon hitting the wall. FML

by EpicFail / 02/04/2009 at 6:29pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals