XxxAnitaxxX

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Offline (the 09/17/2014 at 12:00pm)

XxxAnitaxxX

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 7 June 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3634
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About XxxAnitaxxX : I'm hungry. Bi. Interested in someone. Still hungry. Feed me pie. I like pie. Yummy. Okay. Bye.

XxxAnitaxxX's page activity

Visits<b>bmckee196</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 3:20pm<b>rissamarie</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 5:59pm<b>lakers12324</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 4:01pm<b>Leo619</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 11:13am<b>Krastrolytric</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 5:11am<b>falsecut</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 12:12am<b>Amy_Nguyen_12</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 7:29pm<b>ILoveMyIpad1234</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 11:14pm<b>dukefan302</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 9:57am<b>Ayezed</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 1:06pm<b>BiGBoYWaNTsSoDa</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 11:33pm<b>cassidia952</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 5:04pm<b>Taylor22294</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 10:40pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 9:40am<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 4:27am<b>cat_marie</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 9:12pm<b>Gregshelton8611</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 7:39pm<b>stonedagain</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 6:19pm

XxxAnitaxxX's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of XxxAnitaxxX's badges

XxxAnitaxxX's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I sat our 10-year-old daughter down for a chat over her recent cursing. When my husband asked where she'd heard the words, she "innocently" replied, "from mommy's other boyfriend." He took her seriously, accused me of cheating, and hasn't been home since. FML

by mandybar15 / 12/14/2012 at 6:52pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, I went on a date with a great girl; we went out to dinner and saw a movie. After the movie, we went out to my car to find out that a homeless man had broken the window, climbed into it, and was eating the leftover pasta with his fingers. FML

by Alec / 12/10/2012 at 2:01am / United States / Transportation

Today, I was getting intimate with my current bootycall when he thought it would be funny to make animal sounds. He "baa-ed" "moo-ed" and "gobbled" until losing his erection from intense laughter, leaving me there very confused and unsatisfied. FML

by Bug5992 / 12/09/2012 at 5:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML

by SamWGovan / 12/09/2012 at 11:57am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out my new girlfriend is a screamer. This would normally turn me on, except she sounds like she's being murdered with a rusty fork. FML

by Dontwaketheneighbors / 12/06/2012 at 9:24am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my dog died and I told my grandfather I wanted her to be cremated. I came home later to find him burning her in our barbecue pit. FML

by psd60 / 12/06/2012 at 2:18am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex when the condom broke. He told me to go put a tampon in to "soak up the kids". How did he graduate? FML

by me. / 12/01/2012 at 9:54am / United States / Intimacy

Today, in a state of extreme boredom, I decided to dress my 6-month-old son in girl's clothes. As he sat in my lap in a frilly dress, and as I was placing a very pink and lacy bow on his head, my mother-in-law unexpectedly walked in. She now thinks I'm mentally unstable and should be in therapy. FML

Today, my girlfriend dared me to put on her bra and panties and give her a lap dance. Feeling spontaneous, I decided to do it. Just as I was getting really into it, she told me I was on webcam for all her friends. Apparently it was a contest of who had their boyfriend the most whipped. She won. FML

by Embarassed / 11/23/2012 at 1:14am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML

by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE / 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

by nekkidness / 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML

by wow babe / 11/19/2012 at 12:46pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, I realized the number of cats I currently have is higher than the number of guys I've ever dated. FML

by crazycatlady / 11/19/2012 at 11:15am / United States / Animals

Today, my girlfriend of 6 months yelled at me for not comforting her while she was crying because her ex got a new girlfriend, and "it's just not fair." FML

by they've been broken up for a year. / 11/19/2012 at 2:13am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my girlfriend claimed she was a Viking because she's pale and has blond hair. She also warned me that if I piss her off she'll go 'berserk' on me. She demonstrated by smacking me in the nuts with a wooden spoon. FML

by jasmith / 11/18/2012 at 2:45am / United States (Texas) / Love