About Xx_Benny73_xX : driving a racecar has been a dream my whole life!
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Xx_Benny73_xX's favorite FMLs
by phlyingphuck / 07/19/2009 at 11:12am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, after not seeing my boyfriend for 9 months, he came to meet me at the airport. I was so excited when I first saw him that I broke into a sprint to greet him. Apparently, running through the airport looks suspicious, because a security guard tackled me. Now I have a broken nose. FML
by Anonymous / 07/19/2009 at 9:49am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, my daughter turned 11. Since she LOVES Harry Potter, I decided to write her an acceptance letter to Hogwarts. When she saw the letter, she screamed and showed me. When she found out I wrote it, she told me she hated me, started crying, and stepped on my foot. FML
by notawizard / 07/16/2009 at 6:16am / Spain (Catalonia) / Kids
by joking0303 / 07/16/2009 at 3:08am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/16/2009 at 1:32am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend watching a movie, my boyfriend then leans in and says: "You know, you're my favourite girlfriend." I then jokingly responded by saying: "You say that like I'm not the only girlfriend you have right now." I hate being right. FML
by dinapar / 07/14/2009 at 10:02am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous
by pkstarstorm / 07/14/2009 at 2:58am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went on a movie date. During the movie, I picked a small zit on my forehead. Afterwards, at dinner, he couldn't seem to keep his eyes off of my face. I thought he was staring lovingly at me. He was actually staring at a large throbbing zit with a trail of blood coming from it. FML
by Zitty / 07/12/2009 at 2:18pm / United States (Colorado) / Love
Today, it was my wedding day. I had my butt clenched during the ceremony. I was giving my husband the ring, but dropped it. When I went to retrieve it, I let a huge one ripe. My husband yelled "she likes to eat beans." FML
by 1234 / 07/11/2009 at 12:41pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went with my sister to get our eyebrows waxed. I didn't think my eyebrows were that bad--and they weren't! When the guy waxed my eyebrows, he gestured my lips and said, "Moustache, too?" Mortified, I said, "No!" to which he replied, "Aw, someone no get kissy tonight." FML
by RR / 07/11/2009 at 1:58am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to my friend's house for the first time. As I was pulling up, I called him and asked him if I could use his bathroom. He told me to just go in the back and use it, so i did. As i'm sitting on the toilet, someone knocks on the door and asks me who I am. It wasn't my friend's house. FML
by whitewater_al / 07/10/2009 at 5:22pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mom turned to me and said, "You know, you're the kind of person that has to change literally everything about themselves to get a guy to like you." I thought she was joking so I laughed. She then said "Like that. Your laugh... What is that? Change that." FML
by Anonymous / 07/08/2009 at 5:43pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
by dumpedovergame / 07/06/2009 at 6:51am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because she wants to "become" a lesbian. I also learned that she's coming to my house for dinner tonight. My sister is her date. FML
by fd_uplife / 07/05/2009 at 12:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
by Cococautly / 07/04/2009 at 12:49am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
- Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was… Today, it was my last day working at my company. The whole staff was summoned to a meeting, but I… Today, I told my son off because he lost a form. A form that I later found in my right-hand pocket.…