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XxYasBerryxX

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XxYasBerryxX

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 8 January 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 323
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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XxYasBerryxX's page activity

Visits<b>AnalAssassin1</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 8:29pm<b>jonathanedwards</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 6:11pm

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XxYasBerryxX's favorite FMLs

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36398) - you deserved it (9979)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that when someone is choking you don't do the "hymen maneuver", you do the "heimlich maneuver". I was corrected by my girlfriend's parents. FML

#21240474
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31212) - you deserved it (13747)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:29pm - misc - by FANZZY - United States (New York)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40785) - you deserved it (25688)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML

#20585643
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37886) - you deserved it (9159)

On 04/11/2013 at 8:59pm - animals - by anyonmus - United States (Maryland)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML

#20510302
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38644) - you deserved it (9277)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Notaplacetogo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while reading in the bath, I accidentally switched the shower on. Not wanting my book to get soaked, I threw it out of the tub. When I got out of the tub later, I found it had landed squarely in the toilet. FML

#20479000
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27310) - you deserved it (11348)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:03am - misc - by stelssy (woman) - United States

Today, my laptop got hit by a Trojan. Not the malware, but a used condom thrown from a car driving past as I sat on a street bench. FML

#20091945
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32549) - you deserved it (2380)

On 09/28/2012 at 4:24am - intimacy - by iNearlyHurled - United States

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10739) - you deserved it (36875)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

#19525973
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23908) - you deserved it (2693)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:22am - intimacy - by intheairtonight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML

#19475030
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19197) - you deserved it (36755)

On 04/15/2012 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by lifeonfire12 (woman) - Canada

Today, while walking to work, I swore I saw one of my old friends from college standing in the park across the street. I started shouting her name and waving my hands like a maniac to get her attention. It was a statue. FML

#19447038
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9495) - you deserved it (22603)

On 04/10/2012 at 11:49pm - misc - by Becca (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I called my girlfriend saying "I think we need to break up." She said "No, I don't think so," and hung up. FML

#19387601
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16739) - you deserved it (30112)

On 04/01/2012 at 10:03am - love - by Jeff make - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, in the middle of sex my boyfriend asked if he could use the bathroom. It would've been fine, if he didn't fall asleep on the toilet. FML

#19216663
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22301) - you deserved it (2578)

On 03/04/2012 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by Karen (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML

#18981474
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15225) - you deserved it (21902)

On 02/03/2012 at 12:25am - misc - by coleslaw (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my biology teacher assigned us partners for a project. I got paired up with one of the smartest kids in the class. When he found out I was his partner, he cried. FML

#18710808
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28673) - you deserved it (7979)

On 01/04/2012 at 10:07pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)



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