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XxReddragonxX

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XxReddragonxX
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  • Number of visits : 1171
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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XxReddragonxX's favorite FMLs

Today, I was going 73 in a 55 on a country road when an oncoming cop passed me. He pulled a U turn. I turned off the main road and took random turns. I got lost, was 30 minutes late to work, and the cop still found me and gave me two tickets. I had to ask him for directions. FML

#1021876
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9319) - you deserved it (83122)

On 04/16/2009 at 2:52pm - work - by TheBRADLeyB (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was visiting my grandmother's house. She keeps the thermostat on 85 and after about 30 minutes I explained to her "I'm going to have to leave, it's just too hot in here". She replied: "You think it's hot in here, wait until you get to hell." I laughed. She didn't. FML

#993932
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59003) - you deserved it (5573)

On 04/15/2009 at 3:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend of 17 months, the first guy to tell me he loves me, the guy I lost my virginity to, the only guy whose parents I've met, told me we should stop 'hooking up' because it's weird that I was telling everyone we were a couple and it was ruining his chances of finding a girlfriend. FML

Today, cops showed up at my apartment demanding to look inside. Satisfied with the search, they told me they had received a noise complaint. More specifically, hearing screams someone believed a girl was getting raped. I had two friends over and we had been wrestling. The three of us are male. FML

#966967
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68430) - you deserved it (24738)

On 04/14/2009 at 10:05am - intimacy - by Obee (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
663 comments

I agree, your life sucks (656791) - you deserved it (48844)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theater. This six year old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your shit." I just got told by a six year old. FML

#958764
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56424) - you deserved it (6414)

On 04/13/2009 at 8:44pm - work - by brad3720 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I handed the keys to my Mustang to my mom so she could go car shopping. As she pulled away, I remembered the condom wrappers, sex toy packaging, and empty bottle of rum that was in the passenger's seat of my car. I'm twenty. FML

#945659
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11938) - you deserved it (73160)

On 04/13/2009 at 6:46am - intimacy - by jackass (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was with my girlfriend in her room. She starts screaming. Her father bursts in and, thinking I'm some kind of rapist, hits me in the head with a baseball bat. Not bad enough? I wasn't the one making her scream. There was a huge spider on the wall. FML

#927361
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92247) - you deserved it (4272)

On 04/12/2009 at 2:11pm - animals - by spiderhater (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was pulled over for not having my car inspection up to date. I had my car inspected two weeks earlier. Since I'm at college my sticker was mailed to my home. My mother didn't want to pay the 42cent postage so now I have to pay $250.00 because my mother is cheap. FML

#902369
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54755) - you deserved it (3550)

On 04/10/2009 at 2:39pm - money - by Stickerless (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

#877965
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58770) - you deserved it (8848)

On 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm - misc - by eun (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I made the mistake of sneezing in front of a hyper religious customer, who for ten minutes blamed the incident of shifting weather patterns that signaled the return of Jesus, who was as she explained, upset about the abortion rates in America and President Obama. FML

#867771
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65670) - you deserved it (4593)

On 04/08/2009 at 6:26am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, on my flight to Vegas, I was wishing that a really cute guy would come sit in the seat next to mine. A few minutes later, a really cute guy sat in the seat next to me and even started to talk to me. When I said, "I like rugged men." he said "Oh ya, me too! I really like buff guys also." FML

#831202
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59814) - you deserved it (10724)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:40am - love - by vela9002 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to buy beer underage for a party to impress a girl. I picked up the case of beer and went to the cashier, he ran it through without asking for ID. I left the store with a smirk on my face, I arrived at the party and showed the case to the girl. It was non-alcoholic. FML

#825703
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8810) - you deserved it (86704)

On 04/05/2009 at 10:22pm - love - by Triedtobecool (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was riding my bike and stopped at a street light. A little girl looked at me, then asked her mother, "Mommy, why does that girl have a ring through her nose?" Her mother then replied, "Because her parents don't love her." FML

#818828
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62194) - you deserved it (16982)

On 04/05/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, the director of the play I'm in decided to explain why we got the parts we did. He said he tried matching our characters to who we actually are. I play a whore who's a transvestite. FML

#818560
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62372) - you deserved it (5748)

On 04/05/2009 at 3:11pm - misc - by InsideActress (woman) - Canada (Quebec)



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