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XxReddragonxX

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XxReddragonxX

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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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XxReddragonxX's FML badges

Inception

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The Mixer

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XxReddragonxX's favorite FMLs

Today, I dyed my hair blonde for my boyfriend, hoping it would help spice up our sex life. His response? It's still a few shades off from his favorite porn star. FML

#6193403
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21295) - you deserved it (4714)

On 11/07/2009 at 7:55am - intimacy - by Blondegirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I ran out of my usual hand lotion that I use for 'me time'. I instead decided to try and us my after shave lotion as a replacement. Apparently, my member doesn't agree with one of the ingredients, and has now swollen to the size of my fist. FML

#6160580
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6274) - you deserved it (28807)

On 11/04/2009 at 11:17pm - intimacy - by Metime (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, as I stepped into the shower, I slipped and fell over the edge of the tub, pulling the shower curtain down with me. I called my roommate to help me up as I put on a towel over me. But before she could help me up, she grabbed her phone to take a picture. The picture became a mass text. FML

#6150429
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27457) - you deserved it (3241)

On 11/04/2009 at 12:40pm - misc - by xo007 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I asked my girlfriend about a diamond necklace I bought her for her birthday, which she didn't seem to be wearing. She then told me she hocked it to pay for her inexpensive phone bill. I paid $1,500 for that necklace, she received $300 from the pawn shop. FML

#6132139
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38222) - you deserved it (4204)

On 11/03/2009 at 6:02am - money - by I_Lossed (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was hanging out with my friends. My friend started talking about how unfair it is that women can use their breasts to get promotions. I told him that he has no place to talk, as he used his "d*ck" a few months ago with his female boss. His girlfriend of 3 years was sitting next to me. FML

#6122066
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8471) - you deserved it (28520)

On 11/02/2009 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by konichiwa (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was woken up from a phone call from my boss. He asked if I had been asleep. I told him I wasn't, that I was in my car on the way to work. Then my alarm went off. FML

#6068471
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6939) - you deserved it (37428)

On 10/30/2009 at 9:19am - misc - by Coach (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I met a close friend of my husband for the first time. She told me it was amazing that I agreed to be in an open marriage and asked if sex was weird knowing he'd slept with other women. No, the sex wasn't weird, because we're not in an open marriage. FML

#6067617
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28412) - you deserved it (2112)

On 10/30/2009 at 5:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I got a text from my boyfriend that said, "Last week was the most embarassing time of my life, we're over." He was of course referring to the seizure that I had due to my epilepsy at Olive Garden. FML

#6060291
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42551) - you deserved it (2462)

On 10/29/2009 at 7:44pm - love - by Allie (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was driving to work. I saw a cute boy in the car next to me. To try and look cool, I pretended I was talking on my cell phone. I got pulled over and got a ticket for using my cell phone while driving. FML

#6057828
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5608) - you deserved it (62540)

On 10/29/2009 at 5:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend's best friend was dumped, and was absolutely depressed. My girlfriend thought she'd show her sympathy by breaking up with me so they "could be single together." FML

#6028042
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46839) - you deserved it (2433)

On 10/27/2009 at 7:13pm - love - by dumped (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my husband's daughter told us that she's 5 months pregnant. I'm going to be a step grandmother and I'm only 23 years old. FML

#6001127
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20109) - you deserved it (44605)

On 10/26/2009 at 12:27am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was playing Farmville all day, and I was really into the game. I was getting phone calls all day, but I kept ignoring them cause I was making so much Farm Money. Come to find out it was my son's school. He fell off the jungle gym and broke his arm. FML

#5970435
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8014) - you deserved it (125785)

On 10/24/2009 at 3:25am - kids - by stewhart (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I took a smoke break at work and I noticed a huge zit on my face. I used the reflection from a window to take care of the problem and then realized that there was a staff meeting taking place on the other side. FML

#5947832
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9942) - you deserved it (36063)

On 10/22/2009 at 7:05pm - misc - by JC (man) - United States (California)

Today, I texted my brother saying "Always remember I love you! Never forget it!" to which he answered: "You better not be doing drugs." FML

#5933276
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24958) - you deserved it (8971)

On 10/21/2009 at 7:21pm - love - by Lovelysister (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out who the father of my sister's 4 year old son is. My husband of 7 years. FML

#5928824
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61016) - you deserved it (3033)

On 10/21/2009 at 2:31pm - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)



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