Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

XxReddragonxX

Search for a member

XxReddragonxX
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1151
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

XxReddragonxX's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

XxReddragonxX's favorite FMLs

Today, I was awakened by the sound of chain-saws. Moments later a tree branch came through my roof. FML

#5040554
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40453) - you deserved it (1713)

On 09/04/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by 1ndustrytx (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend called me and told me to come to her college, so I did. I was greeted by the campus police who told me to stop harassing her because she no longer wants to be with me. Then they told me I was no longer welcome on campus and hereby banned. She used campus police to dump me. FML

#5029285
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45310) - you deserved it (2607)

On 09/03/2009 at 9:45pm - love - by Wow (man) - United States

Today, a foreigner walked into my restaurant to pick up his pizzas. The bill was $25 and he gave me $30 and a 100 dollar bill. I gave him his change from the 30 and I didn't understand so I gave him back the 100 dollars. He said "Well if you dont want it, okay." He was gonna tip me $100. FML

#4999366
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42591) - you deserved it (12572)

On 09/02/2009 at 2:29pm - money - by Lizzzyygurl (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML

#4998689
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42190) - you deserved it (12442)

On 09/02/2009 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my best friend thought it would be funny push me off my bike. He thought it was even funnier when the paramedic accidentally dropped me. FML

#4983911
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40093) - you deserved it (2394)

On 09/01/2009 at 8:04pm - health - by Misterhippo (man) - United States (California)

Today, my college roommate whom I've never met moved in. Good thing I wasn't completely naked, playing with myself on the couch when he walked in. That would've been awkward. FML

#4983449
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8489) - you deserved it (34802)

On 09/01/2009 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by mrboston (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the movies with the girl I liked. She kept on eating my popcorn so I whispered in her ear "Pretty soon your going to have to repay me with kisses." Then she looked at me and walked out the theatre. She came back with a bucket of popcorn and said "Here, you're repaid." FML

#4925971
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30471) - you deserved it (38178)

On 08/30/2009 at 8:19am - love - by regected (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up in my bunkbed because I thought I was experiencing my first earthquake ever. I jumped out of bed and found that it was just my roomate masturbating in the bottom bunk. It was 6am. FML

#4912906
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40091) - you deserved it (3177)

On 08/29/2009 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by Ned (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up in my bunkbed because I thought I was experiencing my first earthquake ever. I jumped out of bed and found that it was just my roomate masturbating in the bottom bunk. It was 6am. FML

#4912906
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40091) - you deserved it (3177)

On 08/29/2009 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by Ned (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was on the webcam with my boyfriend. I could see that he was on the couch, and alone, so I took off my shirt and smiled, waiting to see his reaction. He smiled at me but then kept looking in another direction. I playfully asked "What's so distracting?" His answer: "History Channel". FML

#4896361
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37754) - you deserved it (8663)

On 08/29/2009 at 12:27am - love - by notenough (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I tried to initiate sex with my boyfriend. As I put on my most seductive moves, he ever so nicely says, "Babe, we just had sex last night. Why don't we wait a while so you've had some time to tighten back up." FML

#4859108
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55261) - you deserved it (8406)

On 08/27/2009 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by LizP40 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried to initiate sex with my boyfriend. As I put on my most seductive moves, he ever so nicely says, "Babe, we just had sex last night. Why don't we wait a while so you've had some time to tighten back up." FML

#4859108
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55261) - you deserved it (8406)

On 08/27/2009 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by LizP40 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried to initiate sex with my boyfriend. As I put on my most seductive moves, he ever so nicely says, "Babe, we just had sex last night. Why don't we wait a while so you've had some time to tighten back up." FML

#4859108
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55261) - you deserved it (8406)

On 08/27/2009 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by LizP40 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried to initiate sex with my boyfriend. As I put on my most seductive moves, he ever so nicely says, "Babe, we just had sex last night. Why don't we wait a while so you've had some time to tighten back up." FML

#4859108
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55261) - you deserved it (8406)

On 08/27/2009 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by LizP40 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my 5-year-old daughter saw a pad commercial. She asked me what they were, but I didn't think she was old enough to hear it. I just told her that they're like diapers for mommies. Now she won't stop telling people that mommy wears diapers. FML

#4833431
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13191) - you deserved it (40105)

On 08/26/2009 at 10:17am - misc - by diapermommy (woman) - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: