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XxReddragonxX

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XxReddragonxX

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XxReddragonxX's FML badges

Inception

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

50 favourites

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XxReddragonxX's favorite FMLs

Today, at Walmart, a crazy old woman bitched me out for being pregnant. She kept following me around, calling me a stupid teen slut and saying she hoped my baby died so I could live a "normal life". I'm 26 and just very short. FML

#21341527
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39861) - you deserved it (2216)

On 01/21/2015 at 9:34am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out the pet name my girlfriend gave my penis wasn't randomly made up after all; it's her ex's name. FML

#21341448
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32986) - you deserved it (2919)

On 01/21/2015 at 3:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I let out a monstrous fart at the gym. They said it didn't even sound human. FML

#21341250
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27380) - you deserved it (6081)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:41pm - misc - by highschoolsucks - United States

Today, while trying to take a crap, I shut the bathroom door. A minute later, my 3 year old daughter knocked and said "Mommy, do you wanna build a snowman?" She kept singing the song until I was finally done. FML

#21341221
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30330) - you deserved it (4249)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:05pm - kids - by frozenpoo - United States

Today, I sat my son down for the sex talk. By the time it was over, he'd corrected me on several factual errors and told me what felching is. Now I remember why I never wanted kids. FML

#21340142
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31109) - you deserved it (6416)

On 01/19/2015 at 9:34am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I found myself wondering if my sister's jaw makes the same clicking sound when she's giving head as it does when she's eating food. FML

Today, I found three of my sister's dildos as I helped her unpack boxes for her new house. Jokingly, I said, "Why would you even need three?!" She actually explained. FML

#21334501
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30802) - you deserved it (10205)

On 01/10/2015 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by sisterlylove - United States (Missouri)

Today, I accidentally sent my teacher a picture of me in my boyfriend's boxers instead of my essay. FML

#21334385
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24706) - you deserved it (18804)

On 01/10/2015 at 9:35am - misc - by kb (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to deal with numerous complaints about an employee washing their genitals in the communal bathroom sink. Nothing in the HR manual prepared me for this. FML

Today, my neighbor showed me footage of my 7-year-old son spraying his beloved rose garden with weed killer. The whole garden is dead as fuck, and I'm now being taken to small claims court. FML

#21311905
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30923) - you deserved it (6384)

On 12/05/2014 at 8:44am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I finally got time to take a nap. Later, my mom asked me if I was depressed because I didn't leave my room for 3 hours. She talked to my dad about it, and now my family thinks I'm depressed because I slept for 3 hours. FML

#21306606
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30638) - you deserved it (2427)

On 11/27/2014 at 2:06am - misc - by Sleep. - United States (Missouri)

Today, I thought I'd lost the ring that my boyfriend had given me, in the snow, in the dark. I spent a half hour with a flashlight searching every part of my driveway. The ring was on my kitchen windowsill the whole time. I took it off earlier to do dishes. FML

#21306486
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26834) - you deserved it (6654)

On 11/26/2014 at 10:33pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it was my turn to open the bar I work at. As I walked into our terrace, I found our insane upstairs neighbour leaving the scene without a word. This was right before I spotted the steaming pile of dung she'd left behind. FML

#21306439
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26299) - you deserved it (1841)

On 11/26/2014 at 9:04pm - work - by caterinette - Portugal

Today, I saw what my mom handed out for trick-or-treaters last night. Toothbrushes. Yup, we're that house. FML

#21289931
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33894) - you deserved it (2820)

On 11/01/2014 at 6:22pm - kids - by ThaBoss12 - United States (California)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

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  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

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