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XxRandomMonkeyxX

Offline (the 09/13/2014 at 12:59am) | Search for a member

XxRandomMonkeyxX

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  • Number of visits : 117
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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XxRandomMonkeyxX's page activity

Visits<b>singer0421</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 11:47pm<b>tweetypie</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 12:35pm<b>hotPinklipstick</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 6:50pm<b>coolsoccer1234</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 2:08pm<b>tifdunc</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 2:07pm<b>way2go</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 12:54pm<b>SkinYouAlive</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 12:18pm<b>Amy_000</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 11:28am<b>DArthurVaderian</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 5:14pm

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XxRandomMonkeyxX's favorite FMLs

Today, I made an excuse and didn't turn up at work. Little did I know my boss did the same. We both bumped into each other at the shopping centre across town. FML

#21185382
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38658) - you deserved it (23222)

On 06/23/2014 at 2:11pm - work - by AGB10 - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, despite years of paranoid checking, I forgot to check my towel for spiders after my shower. Two crawled onto me, and I'm pretty sure there's one somewhere in my hair. FML

#21161379
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40011) - you deserved it (4924)

On 06/03/2014 at 4:56am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, thanks to my phone's shitty predictive text combined with me being half-asleep, I accidentally offered my heartbroken buddy "oral support" if he ever needs it. FML

#21151390
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45456) - you deserved it (8847)

On 05/25/2014 at 5:23pm - intimacy - by whoops (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, at my job at a fast-food restaurant, I once again got called into the men's bathroom to break up sex between two homeless people. FML

#21145062
191 comments

Today, I was texting an artist friend telling her I wanted to buy her paintings; going on and on about how much I wanted it and loved the way they looked and couldn't wait to have them. I realized my phone had corrected paintings to panties. FML

#21091119
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37321) - you deserved it (4952)

On 03/19/2014 at 7:19pm - misc - by BigBlue (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML

#20199046
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11273) - you deserved it (38187)

On 12/10/2012 at 1:09pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I saw an old man struggling with three bags, so I offered to carry them for him. He must not have heard me because when I bent down to take the bags, he thought I was stealing them and punched me in the face. FML

#19820336
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20093) - you deserved it (3390)

On 06/20/2012 at 7:27pm - misc - by punchedhelper (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I came home to my front door open and a homeless man taking a 'bath' in my sink. If this wasn't bad enough, he refused to leave because 'finders keepers!' FML

#16243559
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35453) - you deserved it (3586)

On 05/18/2011 at 9:07pm - misc - by Ally (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I walked into the bathroom and found my sister cleaning her vibrator. With my toothbrush. FML

#2740699
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (117633) - you deserved it (7299)

On 06/09/2009 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by quadropheniac (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She told me that her father didn't approve of me and forced her out of the relationship. Her father died 2 years ago. FML

#2273679
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66064) - you deserved it (3490)

On 05/25/2009 at 12:43pm - love - by nadette (man) - United States (California)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1157164) - you deserved it (115931)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)



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