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Xquisite1

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Xquisite1

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2350
  • Number of comments : 214
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Xquisite1's page activity

Visits<b>Hardizzle9</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 1:07pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 1:29am<b>WD_Stevens</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 10:46pm<b>melons</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 3:32pm<b>BENBOT</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 7:18pm<b>mirrriam</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 4:00am<b>sandman676</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 8:33pm<b>igottapee</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 12:10am<b>lyricalservant</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 11:17pm<b>PilyoRosas</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 12:52pm<b>Chesties</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 9:46am<b>carllyo</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 4:59am<b>Allornone</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 6:02am<b>nerdtron430</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 12:08pm<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 10:19am<b>tink6190</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 2:58am<b>ChunkyM0nkeyz</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 3:03am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 2:07pm

Fucked!<b>mirrriam</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 10:00am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 8:07pm<b>Desi_D123</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 5:54am<b>CCRider</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 2:48pm

Xquisite1's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Xquisite1's badges

Xquisite1's favorite FMLs

Today, my cat sneezed directly into my open eyeball. FML

#14505614
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26659) - you deserved it (4973)

On 01/08/2011 at 3:57am - animals - by ciotter (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to take a nap in the university library. I felt like I'd only closed my eyes for a minute, when a guy woke me up to tell me that I'd been farting in my sleep for the last half hour, and that the librarian was becoming concerned. FML

#14109722
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29072) - you deserved it (8449)

On 12/06/2010 at 5:53pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was substitute teaching a middle school class, a boy, named Chris, refused to get in the boy's line for the bathroom. After I had said, "Chris, what makes you think you're a girl?" in a very loud voice, one of the other students said "She is a girl." I've scarred a child for life. FML

#13571431
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13397) - you deserved it (48915)

On 10/24/2010 at 1:26am - kids - by badteacher (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

#13432324
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38024) - you deserved it (21774)

On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)

Today, I discovered that my mom is having an affair... with her cousin. FML

#12322753
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55967) - you deserved it (4028)

On 08/05/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Drew - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered that my mom is having an affair... with her cousin. FML

#12322753
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55967) - you deserved it (4028)

On 08/05/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Drew - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML

#9040804
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28556) - you deserved it (9348)

On 03/13/2010 at 4:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I was at the movie theatre. I went to the bathroom, and was about to wipe my butt when I realized that where the toilet-paper dispenser should have been, there was a large hole. The woman in the next stall waved. FML

#7309178
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28718) - you deserved it (5104)

On 01/12/2010 at 9:57pm - misc - by pass_the_tp (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I told my boyfriend that since I lost my job I can't afford a Christmas present for him, or anyone. He said trying anal would be fine. FML

#6456555
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23855) - you deserved it (11949)

On 11/26/2009 at 12:31am - intimacy - by ehwat (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my mom's "hobby" of rescuing homeless people became very real. We now have 3 more people living in our house, and none of them have a sense of personal space. I wake up to their faces in my windows. Thanks mom. FML

#6350445
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33684) - you deserved it (2240)

On 11/18/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by Bribri (man) - United States (California)

Today, I am in a very long line at the supermarket, gazing about in complete boredom when I spot a lady cradling what appears to be a cute newborn baby. Being enamored of all babies, I get off the line, go over and say "Oh, what a cute little baby!" The lady was holding a coconut. FML

#5762381
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8192) - you deserved it (41994)

On 10/10/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by BEE (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I knew his parents wouldn't be there. Later, I woke up in a hospital bed because his sister thought I was a burglar and tased me. FML

#5738232
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11503) - you deserved it (39051)

On 10/09/2009 at 11:05am - love - by TasedAndDazed (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my english teacher asked me why I didn't have my project completed. Thinking quick on my feet I told her it was because my grandmother had just passed away. Apparently they go to the same country club and have known each other for years. My teacher started crying and ran out of the room. FML

#5607225
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8033) - you deserved it (66509)

On 10/02/2009 at 5:07pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was walking whilst texting. I thought I was going in a straight line but I ended up walking right into an open phone booth. A woman was inside making a phone call. I lost my balance, pinning her up against the wall. She thought I was attacking her and clobbered me with the receiver. FML

#5504838
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8796) - you deserved it (46171)

On 09/27/2009 at 11:59am - misc - by absentmindedmoron (man) - United Kingdom (Peterborough)

Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML

#4976961
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18669) - you deserved it (372940)

On 09/01/2009 at 2:05pm - work - by Hairball (man) - United States (South Carolina)



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