Xquisite1

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Xquisite1

9Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3215
  • Number of comments : 238
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Xquisite1's page activity

Visits<b>thunderniron</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 9:48pm<b>Mynxie</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 1:48am<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 07/07/2016 at 10:53pm<b>Martinez0285</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 12:25am<b>trashyant</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 11:22pm<b>somelildude</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 10:24pm<b>ifuckuprandomly</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 10:08am<b>MamaChey</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 4:04pm<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 1:59am<b>Nathan_Henry</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 7:00pm<b>thatkidzach666</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 1:34pm<b>swenny_xoxo</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 1:20pm<b>RnLaLa</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 12:23pm<b>pandor</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 9:13am<b>etePdyS</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 8:54am<b>naajster</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 5:02am<b>Allornone</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 4:56am<b>balboa_2</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 4:13am

Fucked!<b>pandor</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 3:13pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 4:18pm<b>khoov19</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 6:55am<b>hard_candy</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 5:40am<b>mirrriam</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 10:00am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 8:07pm<b>Desi_D123</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 5:54am<b>CCRider</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 2:48pm

Xquisite1's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

See all of Xquisite1's badges

Xquisite1's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend of three days met up with me at the movie theater, sporting a crude tattoo of my face on his cheek, along with a love heart and the word "forever." Looks like I'm single again. FML

by maybe dead in a day / 01/20/2013 at 2:28pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2012 at 5:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML

by Anonymous / 07/27/2012 at 12:46am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I walked into my upstairs bathroom to find my mom's new boyfriend eating soup, naked on the toilet. In shock, I stepped back and fell down a flight of stairs, backwards, and hit my head on wall, leaving a dent in it. FML

by Lilragu97 / 07/26/2012 at 1:14am / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML

by Flip / 05/02/2012 at 1:06am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Love

Today, as I was crossing an intersection, a car ran a red light and almost hit me. This kind of thing happens a lot in my town so I'm used to almost being run-down, except this time it was a small boy on his father's lap steering. The dad was laughing. FML

by Diffy / 04/26/2012 at 7:49am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking with my uncle, when the subject of my abusive mother-in-law came up. He assured me he'd talk to her and straighten things out. Apparently this means posting on her Facebook wall threatening to "pimp-slap a bitch" if she doesn't get her "fat ass out of family business". FML

by ...... / 10/07/2011 at 10:40pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, a man punched me for sleeping with his wife. Bewildered, I insisted I would never sleep with a married woman, to which he retorted "She wasn't my wife when it HAPPENED, dumbass!" I was assaulted for sleeping with my own girlfriend three years ago. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2011 at 3:53pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I had a creepy old guy with awful body odor in my salon. As I was washing his hair, he brought up how he wants to start a garden, and how a woman's monthly flow weirdly helps to make it grow. Then he asked me if I can save up my used tampons for him. FML

by fashionista1787 / 09/11/2011 at 11:23pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Work

Today, I was taking a dump behind a dumpster. I suddenly heard a noise and a vibration against the dumpster. It was a garbage truck lifting it to collect the trash. The garbage men started laughing and took out their phones. FML

by jshi8 / 08/04/2011 at 10:35am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my birthday. I got a phone call from my high school bully, to remind me that he'll always be able to find me and do whatever he wants to me. He does this every year. I turn 34 today. FML

by Snurkles / 07/07/2011 at 8:19am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I snuck up on my girlfriend to give her a kiss. Only after I planted a big one did I realize it was not my girlfriend, or even a girl for that matter. FML

by gabxoxo03 / 06/10/2011 at 3:06pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my husband and I had the grand opening to our new winery. We had a big sign out front saying "FREE GRAPES", to try and get more people interested. People kept giving us dirty looks when passing. We later realized there was something covering the "G". FML

by Anonymous / 04/24/2011 at 12:10am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous