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XohXmyXjonas

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XohXmyXjonas

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3232
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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XohXmyXjonas's page activity

Visits<b>kcpestwick</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 9:52am<b>sebassm</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 4:08pm<b>Jamesps</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 8:07pm<b>DestinysChampion</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 8:29pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 09/12/2009 at 12:59pm

XohXmyXjonas's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of XohXmyXjonas's badges

XohXmyXjonas's favorite FMLs

Today, I fell asleep on the bus and when I woke up, I found out that I missed my stop by ten stops and I was on the last bus of the night. And, to make matters worse, a drunk hobo was sitting next to me with a beer in one hand and was rubbing my leg with the other. FML

#3574946
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44133) - you deserved it (9732)

On 07/08/2009 at 3:24am - misc - by feltuponthe69 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my nine year old son went around telling everyone that me and my husband had a "foursome" last month. It turns out that some douchebag counselor at the camp he goes to thought it would be funny to tell him that a foursome was a divorce. All of his friend's parents think we're kinky freaks. FML

#3571839
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44409) - you deserved it (3424)

On 07/08/2009 at 1:02am - kids - by campmom (woman) -

Today, I lost my cell phone. Since I sleep on the couch, I started looking through the cushions. I didn't find my phone, but after 6 months of uncomfortably sleeping on the couch, I find out I'm sleeping on top of a pull out bed. FML

#3550843
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18128) - you deserved it (58098)

On 07/07/2009 at 10:34am - misc - by stupid (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I returned home to find out that my new and very expensive computer had overheated. I confronted my mom, and she told me that she had covered up the fan because she didn't like the noise. FML

#3549532
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57481) - you deserved it (3411)

On 07/07/2009 at 8:16am - misc - by allwaysbuggedinheaven - United States (Michigan)

Today, my friend told me that she gave my number to a guy I've liked for a while. I asked why and she just said "He's just going to have to tell you himself." I got hopeful and really nervous. A few hours later he calls. Turns out, he's called to try and get a date with my gay friend. FML

#3491271
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36501) - you deserved it (3061)

On 07/04/2009 at 10:40pm - love - by Single4Life (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while going up a ski-lift I accidentally dropped my ticket. The ticket I needed at the top to come back down. I had to hike down the mountain in flip-flops. FML

#3454953
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30332) - you deserved it (14526)

On 07/03/2009 at 1:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I decided to start running to stay fit. Before I left, I put my cell phone in my sweat shirt pocket, and jumped vigorously up and down and ran around my apartment to make sure it wouldn't fall out. On a bridge, it slides out of my pocket and drops fifteen feet into the water below. FML

#3360429
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41807) - you deserved it (15448)

On 06/30/2009 at 5:23am - health - by Ginny (woman) - Netherlands (Friesland)

Today, I finally got the courage to tell my parents that I'm gay. My mom said "Yeah, we know." When I asked how they knew, my dad, without looking up from the tv, said, "We've been monitoring your Internet history." FML

#3330800
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44643) - you deserved it (15410)

On 06/29/2009 at 1:41am - misc - by Asterisk1009 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally thought that my mother was okay with me being a lesbian. Then, over dinner, she turns to me and says "So, do you still think you like girls, or are you going to start being normal again?" FML

#3237223
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55630) - you deserved it (10682)

On 06/26/2009 at 10:22am - love - by shouldhaveknown (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Everything was going great until I noticed a small blinking light on my shelf. It turns out that it was a camera. My mom put it there to make sure I cleaned my room. She saw the whole thing. FML

#3215628
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65493) - you deserved it (10247)

On 06/25/2009 at 9:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I decided to make pancakes from scratch. I poured the batter in my Perfect Pancake pan. Then I told my brother who was watching, "This is so easy. Just watch." I burned 15 pancakes, including the one I dropped on the burner, which lit on fire, causing the alarm to go off. FML

#3205339
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11250) - you deserved it (50777)

On 06/25/2009 at 3:22pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found my long lost diary and curiously read it. What's worse than finding out that your mother read your diary? Finding out that your mother wrote comments in it. FML

#3205233
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62580) - you deserved it (3777)

On 06/25/2009 at 3:15pm - misc - by Emptyspace (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend decided to bribe me to be good since we were going out to dinner with her parents by giving me blowjob. The good news: it was one of the best she had ever given. The bad news: I came on her black dress. She responded by hitting in me in the nuts. Hard. FML

#3176908
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50127) - you deserved it (28869)

On 06/24/2009 at 3:15pm - intimacy - by BadBribe (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, It took me more than 4 hours to set up the back yard for my daughters baby shower. It only took my husband one push of a button to turn on the sprinklers. FML

#3143801
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46326) - you deserved it (3628)

On 06/23/2009 at 11:47am - misc - by stew (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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