Xcin

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Xcin

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 207
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Xcin's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

by Anonymous / 02/21/2013 at 8:43am / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my first day at a new school. I transferred here halfway through the year to get away from a girl who bullies me. She's apparently bullied her mom into transferring her here as well. FML

by SchoolSucks / 02/19/2013 at 12:05pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was in the shower, my boyfriend decided to join me. We were really getting into it and he attempted to lift me up. Not only did I let out a massive fart, he slipped and fell on top of me. He won't stop laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2013 at 3:35am / Intimacy

Today, I was at my boyfriend's grandmother's house meeting her for the first time. I excused myself to the restroom and as I walked out of the room I heard her say, "You could do a lot better. She's fat." Then I heard my boyfriend reply, "I know." FML

by Anonymous / 02/18/2013 at 2:09am / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, while trucking, I got stuck in traffic on a congested highway. After 15 minutes of mind-numbing boredom, I glanced down at the car beside me, only to witness the driver changing her tampon and flicking the old one onto the highway. I can't unsee this. FML

by thoughtidseenitall / 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Colorado) / Transportation

Today, my grandmother walked in on me watching porn on my computer. She looked at the woman on the screen and said, "I used to have tits like that, but look what having 7 kids did to them." Now I'm scarred for life. FML

by Master Debater / 02/01/2013 at 6:05am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I jokingly asked my girlfriend if she thinks I have a big package. She replied that she didn't want to upset me and get into another fight. FML

by notsobig / 01/29/2013 at 5:39pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job." FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2013 at 5:44pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy

Today, I heard an owl near my house. I got excited, as they are not common in the area, and I listened intently to try and locate the source of the sound. After a few minutes, I realized I was not listening to an owl, but to my mother's sex noises. FML

by movingout / 01/26/2013 at 6:50pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, feeling lonely after my recent breakup, I put on my nicest clothes and went out clubbing with a few friends. I brought a guy back to my place, and we got intimate. It was going well, until he took off my push-up bra, then panicked and drunkenly asked, "Where'd they go?!" FML

by chase / 01/24/2013 at 7:54pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

Today, my husband asked me to show him my boob. I began to pull the side of my shirt down when he said, "No, not that one, the big one." FML

by sarah6786 / 01/21/2013 at 9:27pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my hubby asked for a morning blow job, and I happily obliged. All was going great until he came and farted at the same time. I laughed and reassured him it was no big deal. He cried. FML

by airbiscuit / 01/21/2013 at 7:36am / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Intimacy

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he reached out onto my dressing table to grab the lube. He missed, and found the hand sanitizer instead. I'm not sure who is in more pain. FML

by tingles / 01/19/2013 at 8:20am / United Kingdom (Solihull) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbed his butt to control his thrusts and got a clump of used toilet paper. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2013 at 5:50am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I learned my neighbor can access my wireless printer from his house after it started printing off pictures of what I'm assuming is his penis. FML

by itsrathersmall / 01/15/2013 at 4:58pm / United States (North Dakota) / Intimacy