Search for a member

Offline (46 minutes ago)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 January 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2825
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Xatraris : Didn't think I'd have to add this here but here goes. -I don't have kik, imessage, or even a number for you to to text, Skype, call, etc. It is the quickest way to get blocked. Anyway, been on FML for about 3+ years now. mainly seeing how bad everyone's lives are. Warcraft nerd...i think that's all i have to say about myself. I'm not an interesting person. Don't comment too often. Can say hi, but see above. (weird I had to add that) Anyway...thanks for visiting.

Xatraris's page activity

Visits<b>WCARlover</b> - the 11/18/2016 at 9:46am<b>Shamandalie89</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 2:11am<b>ArgentumAurum</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 8:44pm<b>crazy_bananas</b> - the 09/21/2016 at 2:16pm<b>marinade18</b> - the 09/17/2016 at 12:38pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 4:40am<b>Azurexorcist</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 11:23pm<b>lovelylucifer</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 8:20pm<b>ImKimitheEmo</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 2:51pm<b>greenfishbait</b> - the 06/28/2016 at 1:34pm<b>TheZombieGirl</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 11:30pm<b>bbenedict</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 4:29pm<b>MostafaH</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 4:13am<b>ACASEOFU</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 8:03pm<b>awgxkaylaxx</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 8:24pm<b>Malteser95</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 4:45am<b>ourtneyc</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 7:46pm<b>frozencthulhu</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 3:50pm

Fucked!<b>Shamandalie89</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 8:11am<b>ImKimitheEmo</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 5:20pm<b>MisterEx</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 5:32pm<b>Tori_belle</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 4:36pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 8:20pm<b>QueenBii</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 6:25am<b>Malteser95</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 10:34pm<b>Emi1y</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 9:00pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 7:47pm<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 3:30pm<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 4:06am<b>pizzzzza</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 2:43am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 11:17pm<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 11:05am<b>blahblah005</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 2:56am<b>Megatron_Griffin</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 6:22pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 3:52pm<b>kittina</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 8:27am

Xatraris's FML badges


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Xatraris's badges

Xatraris's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried the 'Casual Encounter' page on Craigslist. Three hours, a bunch of spam, and a 30-minute call to some company, speaking to some lady I could barely understand to recover the $40 somehow charged to my card. I think I might want to try other ways to meet people. FML

by StickyPickles / 09/16/2015 at 10:51pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I just found my husband on Craigslist. He's working away from home, and he's looking to give a blowjob. FML

by Anonymous / 07/30/2015 at 3:29pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML

by shmarf / 06/19/2015 at 12:17pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, the doctor let me know I have an autoimmune disease. The disease results in ulcers in my colon which bleed when I poop. I cried, but only when I was told that I wouldn't be allowed to eat cheese anymore. FML

by Anonymous / 02/26/2015 at 7:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML

by SaintGoobers / 10/06/2014 at 4:24pm / United States (New York) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my professor told everyone that he thinks all med students should be required to get a catheter and an enema at least once in their lives so they can relate to their patients, saying, "Gentlemen, it might change your lives." FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2014 at 11:19am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I had a wonderful dream where I got married to the perfect guy, then had the best sex of my life on a beautiful honeymoon. The only problem is that my "husband" was the snowman from Frozen, and that I got sad when I realized it was just a dream. FML

by Anonymous / 05/16/2014 at 5:07pm / United States / Love

Today, one of my year 9 students finished the test an hour early. He decided to spend the time by "stealthily" whacking off. His entire desk was shaking in a silent room. FML

Today, the tornado sirens went off so my family went to the basement and turned on the TV to the local news. The station goes to their sky cam as a trampoline flies by. Quite the sight. When the storm passed, I looked outside to see our trampoline was gone. It was the one flying by on TV. FML

by Gone With the Wind / 05/11/2014 at 11:29pm / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 12-year-old sister watched Frozen. She's spent the last two hours playing the song Let It Go on high volume over and over, and in different languages. I now have a skull-splitting headache, and my dad just sarcastically told me to "let it go". FML

by fuckyouharddad / 04/15/2014 at 3:24pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, it's the last day of my sign language class. At the end of the class, my teacher surprised us by speaking for the first time, also surprising everyone that she wasn't actually deaf. It wouldn't have been so bad had I not just given someone an answer to the test, thinking she couldn't hear me. FML

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

by Charlie529 / 02/19/2014 at 10:30am / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was in the process of finally losing my virginity. Part-way through, my neighbour started shouting from his backyard, "Go, Nicolas! You can do it!" He was talking to his son, but the two of us have the same name. I couldn't finish. FML

by prochainefois / 01/31/2014 at 4:05pm / Intimacy

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

by Anonymous / 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm / Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional) / Animals

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm / United States / Miscellaneous