Xanster82

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Xanster82

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 11 March 1985 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 38440
  • Number of comments : 229
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About Xanster82 : Fatty.

Xanster82's page activity

Visits<b>HarleyBlues</b> - yesterday at 12:07am<b>142asdfqq</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 10:16pm<b>ajk168</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 12:22am<b>Zatert</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 11:16pm<b>StyrisSand</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 3:46pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 11:41am<b>sayhisoph</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 4:43pm<b>Joshua9871</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 12:04am<b>Pie_Raspberry</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 11:08am<b>Chinhull</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 1:46pm<b>WATERFISH21</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 9:41am<b>majoroftheair</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 10:05pm<b>stangluv</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 2:01pm<b>Based_Scooby</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 4:20pm<b>Jayroc</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 11:08pm<b>demix</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 5:40am<b>XxPojoxX</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 10:39pm<b>delfino1604</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 10:37am

Fucked!<b>delfino1604</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 4:37pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 6:27pm<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 6:39am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 11:08pm<b>c_wyld</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 6:36pm<b>casey_ct</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 7:03am

Xanster82's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Xanster82's badges

Xanster82's favorite FMLs

Today, I got all my co-workers motivated. We were all going to quit and walk out the door. I went first. I gave an emotional speech to my boss and threw my uniform to the ground. Then I turned around to to see the rest follow, they all began laughing. They didn't. They WANTED me to quit. FML

by ineedanewjob / 04/08/2009 at 8:34pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I met a guy online. We talked all night long and hit it off amazingly. He told me he'd never felt that way about anyone else, and I agreed. He sent me a picture and he was gorgeous. I sent him one after he assured me he didn't care what I looked like. I haven't heard from him since. FML

by DL06 / 04/08/2009 at 3:19am / United States (Arkansas) / Love

Today, I bought a new purple shirt and decided to wear it to this charity function I was going to. I thought I looked pretty good in it. Then I got home and realized I left the sticker on. I had an "XL" sticker on my boob all night. FML

by jessica238 / 04/08/2009 at 1:38am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw the blueprints for my family's new house. My room is half the size of the room next to it. The room next to it is my step mom's walk-in closet. FML

by Powerfool / 04/07/2009 at 6:07am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy

Today, I went to buy beer underage for a party to impress a girl. I picked up the case of beer and went to the cashier, he ran it through without asking for ID. I left the store with a smirk on my face, I arrived at the party and showed the case to the girl. It was non-alcoholic. FML

by Triedtobecool / 04/05/2009 at 10:22pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, the director of the play I'm in decided to explain why we got the parts we did. He said he tried matching our characters to who we actually are. I play a whore who's a transvestite. FML

by InsideActress / 04/05/2009 at 3:11pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, was the first time my boyfriend slept over. He was hard, so I woke him up by whispering in his ear, "If you could get me to do anything right now, what would it be?" His response, "Can you get me a bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream?" He was hard, for ice cream. FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2009 at 6:57am / Denmark (Roskilde) / Intimacy

Today, I took my son for a walk to tell him about the passing of our family dog. As we were walking by the river, Ozzy (our deceased dog) was laying on the riverbank. My son thought he just ran away and we found him. Turns out my husband was too cheap to pay the 100$ vet disposal fees. FML

by cheaphubbyswife / 04/04/2009 at 5:19am / Canada (Northwest Territories) / Animals

Today, My family and I were in New Orleans. We passed by all of the naughty peep shows with posters of naked women everywhere on the way to dinner. At the restaurant, my dad asks me if that was the first pair of boobs I have seen. My mom butted in saying, "Nah, remember all that porn we found?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2009 at 6:16pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend and he brushed my hair out of my eyes. Then he smiled and said "Your eyes are two different colors right now. One's blue, one's green..." I was so happy he still noticed the little things. Then he finished his sentence with "...ya know, like a dog." FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2009 at 10:37am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I got in my car. When I sat down, I realized a cat had got in the back seat. The cat startled me so I jumped out and slammed the door. Locking myself out. I watched the cat scratch my seats up for an hour. I'm highly allergic to cats. I can't get in my own car without breaking out in hives. FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2009 at 1:23am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, as a joke, my friends plastic wrapped me to my bed while I was sleeping, I had an allergic reaction to the plastic and had to have the girl I like come cut me out and give me my meds. I sleep naked and was unable to put on clothes during this time. She saw me naked, swollen and with hives. FML

by Anonymous / 04/01/2009 at 10:49pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my girlfriend told me how I am too occupied with work for our relationship. Before we had sex I told my friend to call me in ten minutes so I can pretend its my boss and I would throw the phone away to impress her. He called me in ten minutes, but I only lasted five. FML

by Alex / 03/31/2009 at 12:41am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy