Xanster82

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Xanster82

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 March 1987 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 42038
  • Number of comments : 234
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Xanster82 : Fatty.

Xanster82's page activity

Visits<b>Devin143</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 10:45pm<b>142asdfqq</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 11:44am<b>xxfacetimexx</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 1:13am<b>danimal_crackerz</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 10:39pm<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 4:50am<b>cabb30</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 1:04am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 10:51pm<b>Candygrl987</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 3:20am<b>swash984</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 12:39pm<b>special_Kaye</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 12:37am<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 12:21am<b>DylanConnell</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 5:47pm<b>sayhisoph</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 5:19pm<b>demix</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 6:53pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 7:11am<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 12:07am<b>ajk168</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 12:22am<b>Zatert</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 11:16pm

Fucked!<b>Devin143</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 4:45am<b>delfino1604</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 4:37pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 6:27pm<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 6:39am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 11:08pm<b>c_wyld</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 6:36pm<b>casey_ct</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 7:03am

Xanster82's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Xanster82's badges

Xanster82's favorite FMLs

Today, a waiter came up and and put out his hand so I gave him a high five and pounded it. He then says, "Um, that was a nice high five but I wanted your plate." FML

by Clueless / 05/24/2009 at 1:01am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML

by jimbop / 05/23/2009 at 1:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was leaving work when some creeper start following me. When he asked me for my name, I immediately gave him a fake one. He just laughed and said “I hope to see you soon.” He used my real name. First AND last. I was still wearing my name tag. FML

by kandykrazed17 / 05/23/2009 at 8:14am / United States (New York) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while installing a deadbolt on my closet, I did it wrong. It closed but wouldn't lock so I had to re-install it. Sitting on the floor of my closet, I shut it to make sure it was installed correctly. I locked myself in for twenty minutes, home alone, before kicking the door down. FML

by erin3809483 / 05/22/2009 at 8:12pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was running outside. On the last mile I am along side some fields. While running along the side of the road I glanced down and saw a snake. I was so startled I jumped left in front of a car screaming like a girl. The snake was dead. FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2009 at 10:08am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, while cleaning out a closet with my mother, I found a wish list from when I was five. On that list, I wished my parents would divorce. Not only did that seriously hurt my mom, but now she thinks I'm the devil because my wish came true. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2009 at 10:45pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at work at an office store. I was instructed to put together several tape-free cardboard boxes. I then realized that I can disassemble and reassemble a computer with my eyes closed and one hand behind my back, but I was outsmarted by a cardboard box. FML

by StellarSapience / 05/21/2009 at 9:18pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I brought some cupcakes to my class for my birthday, like all the cool kids do. When it came time to sing happy birthday, the entire class said "happy birthday to" then forgot my name. Except my teacher. She said Steve. My name's Jeff. FML

by theman / 05/21/2009 at 4:49pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss came storming towards me, screaming just how tired she is with my constant bullshit. Already pissed off, I retorted that she's a bitch and should go lose some pounds. Turns out she was talking to her husband on her bluetooth headset. FML

by unemployed / 05/21/2009 at 3:16pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I was talking to this guy that I like a lot and I think he likes me back. When he told me I was beautiful I laughed so hard that I farted. Loudly. FML

by ECullen / 05/21/2009 at 3:13pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I spent 3 hours making a birthday card for my boyfriend, delicately cutting each letter out of printed coloured paper. He used it as a coffee coaster. FML

by astraboy / 05/21/2009 at 5:11am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I met up with a guy from a local dating site for coffee. He walked up, looked me over and said "Ummm, no", then walked off. FML

by notnerb / 05/19/2009 at 6:13am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking out of my front door in the town where I intern. I live alone and know no one. As I'm locking the door, I see a golf ball wedged between my mat and step. I notice that there's writing on it so I pick it up to read, "You look hot when you sleep." FML

by emoney / 05/18/2009 at 8:04pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, two of my cousins sat me down and said they wanted to give me an early Birthday present. With straight faces, they look at me and say: "we signed you up for eHarmony, and paid for 12 months." Not only do my cousins think I need help finding a boyfriend, but they think it take a year. FML

by imnotTHATlonely / 05/18/2009 at 4:43pm / United States (Arkansas) / Love

Today, I got my medical checkup back. Apparently, I'm diagnosed with a liver condition generally found in alcoholics. I've never drank in my life. FML

by esk / 05/18/2009 at 4:48am / China (Shanghai) / Health