Xanster82

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Xanster82

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 March 1987 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 45776
  • Number of comments : 235
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Xanster82 : Fatty.

Xanster82's page activity

Visits<b>Justkidding100</b> - the 11/30/2016 at 6:37am<b>swimthenread27</b> - the 11/23/2016 at 4:32pm<b>Devin143</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 10:45pm<b>142asdfqq</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 11:44am<b>xxfacetimexx</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 1:13am<b>danimal_crackerz</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 10:39pm<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 4:50am<b>cabb30</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 1:04am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 10:51pm<b>Candygrl987</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 3:20am<b>swash984</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 12:39pm<b>special_Kaye</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 12:37am<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 12:21am<b>DylanConnell</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 5:47pm<b>sayhisoph</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 5:19pm<b>demix</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 6:53pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 7:11am<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 12:07am

Fucked!<b>Devin143</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 4:45am<b>delfino1604</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 4:37pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 6:27pm<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 6:39am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 11:08pm<b>c_wyld</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 6:36pm<b>casey_ct</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 7:03am

Xanster82's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Xanster82's badges

Xanster82's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my Swedish friend for some lines to impress this swedish girl I met at an expat party he took me to. I practised them all evening before I met her. I told her my feelings, and she scowled. Apparently I had wished the devil upon her - after asking if i could ejaculate on her face. FML

by Dirtyswede / 06/17/2009 at 10:57am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Intimacy

Today, I finished the run for a play in which I played a gay man. Now that all the performances are over, I have kissed a man more times in my life than I have kissed a woman. I'm straight. FML

by yashmoshin1 / 06/17/2009 at 10:06am / United States / Love

Today, my wife took herself, the kids, and extended family members I've never even heard of to New York. She paid the 7,000$ bill with my credit card. FML

by rileym797 / 06/17/2009 at 2:00am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sprained my wrist playing Guitar Hero. The ER doctor called all of his coworkers in to hear my story. They all laughed. FML

by Slash / 06/16/2009 at 12:43pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my high school graduation. Because our school colors were red, black and white, and our principal looked somewhat like Hitler, the senior class prank was to salute him when he finished his speech. I was the only one. FML

by Anonymous / 06/16/2009 at 12:07pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I facebooked my friends about my upcoming birthday party, and told them to keep the date free. I got several responses telling me that's not possible, because that's the day the new Harry Potter movie comes out. FML

by Anonymous / 06/16/2009 at 7:10am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was enjoying some much needed serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To my surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessed, gets up, gives me a nod and leaves. FML

by Tim / 06/16/2009 at 2:15am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I rented some movies in attempts to cheer up my best friend. Her husband just died a few weeks ago in a helicopter accident. I was in a rush and didn't read the descriptions of the two films, one was about a plane crash where all the passengers died. She cried through the entire movie. FML

by idiotfriend / 06/16/2009 at 1:41am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, we had our divorce hearing and now it is final. As we were leaving the courthouse, I told my ex-wife how happy I was that we were finally free from each other. Then my junky old van wouldn't start and I had to beg her for a ride home. FML

by Aerostar / 06/16/2009 at 12:35am / United States (Indiana) / Love

Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML

by Shaun / 06/15/2009 at 10:13pm / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, I went to the bar with some friends. When we walked in, we picked a table at random in the same area as a bunch of older men. The oldest, fattest ugliest man at the table looks me over then stares at my chest. He then starts to motorboat the air in the direction of my boobs. FML

by Hotdamnthisismyjam / 06/15/2009 at 8:32pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I went on a date with this guy and he was on his phone the whole night. When I got home I checked his facebook since he barely paid attention to me. His status was, "So-and-so is taking out the trash" from mobile posted an hour ago. I got home from my date 30 mins ago. FML

by skreweduP / 06/15/2009 at 7:57pm / United States / Love

Today, my dad decided to clean out my car and "accidentally" threw away my $520 tax refund check. FML

by Anonymous / 06/15/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Transportation

Today, I had a horrible day at work, came home early and burst into tears as soon as I was in the door. I curled up on the sofa, still bawling, and my cat came over and jumped up for a cuddle. I gave her a hug and she threw up down my back. FML

by Anonymous / 06/15/2009 at 2:11pm / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, I was being pulled into a pool by my girlfriend. To avoid ruining my phone, I tossed it into one of the chairs behind me. I missed and it landed into the hot tub behind it. FML

by WetPhone / 06/15/2009 at 2:10pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous