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Xanster82

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Xanster82

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 11 March 1985 (30 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 34693
  • Number of comments : 222
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About Xanster82 : Fatty.

Xanster82's page activity

Visits<b>kyranstar</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 2:04pm<b>EvAN_117</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 8:12am<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 12:10am<b>nicofluff</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:22pm<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 2:27pm<b>BWAHA</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 10:44pm<b>DuncanHills</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 1:21am<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 5:25pm<b>felipe2342</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 1:41pm<b>savagetitan</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 11:24am<b>duduv2</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 4:00am<b>Jayroc</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 12:07pm<b>jacob_coryell98</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 5:11am<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 5:00pm<b>ImZacko</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 9:08am<b>Rented_eyebrows</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 11:49pm<b>carlfirebolt</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 11:34pm<b>redlight98</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 6:17pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 11:08pm<b>c_wyld</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 6:36pm<b>casey_ct</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 7:03am

Xanster82's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of Xanster82's badges

Xanster82's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss told me that the company will be hiring a programmer for our department. I had the idea for the position when we went over my 3-year career path last month, but it wasn't approved. I now get to look over résumés from other people applying for my dream job. FML

#21463347
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11960) - you deserved it (713)

On 09/01/2015 at 11:30am - work - by Not a programmer yet (man) - United States (California)

Today, while trying to lift a weight bar at the gym, I ended up cracking my rib cage and almost passed out. My friend, who was supposed to be spotting for me, couldn't help until the last second because he'd snuck off to flirt with a pair of guys halfway across the room. FML

#21459605
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19577) - you deserved it (5216)

On 08/23/2015 at 8:35am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, even after explaining to my boyfriend that I was self conscious about my breasts because they're slightly misshaped, he still persisted with begging me for a tit pic, saying he would still see me as beautiful. I gave in and sent one. He responded with "LOL WHAT ARE THOOOOOOSSSEE." FML

#21459438
162 comments

Today, I overheard my husband telling his friend that he wished a zombie apocalypse would happen in real life, so he could take me out back and shoot me without having to worry about going to prison. FML

#21458894
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27347) - you deserved it (2201)

On 08/21/2015 at 3:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out the girl I met online, who I spent hours talking to every day for the past 2 months, and who I fell in love with is actually my gay roomate. He says if I could fall in love with "her", I can fall in love with him. It doesn't work that way, dickhead. FML

#21457909
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26511) - you deserved it (4059)

On 08/19/2015 at 2:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, at a quiet restaurant, my stepdad loudly told me he hopes in the future they have "hover caskets" so he doesn't have to carry my "fat ass" to the grave. All because I didn't want a side salad. FML

Today, my girlfriend told me she wants to have sex with my ass. I'm not sure she's taking "no" for an answer, seeing as how she's keeping a dildo on her nightstand and is clearly waiting for me to fall asleep. FML

#21456687
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25817) - you deserved it (2602)

On 08/16/2015 at 11:49am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I got in trouble for punching my sister. Apparently, it still counts if it's in Minecraft and she looked like she was going to steal my stuff. FML

#21456039
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21929) - you deserved it (2446)

On 08/14/2015 at 3:31pm - misc - by RobotUnicorn1209 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was unloading Cokes outside of the movie theater I work at. While bent over, I heard someone call out, "Damn girl, you got a fat ass," followed by, "Oh God, that's a man!" I am indeed a man. FML

#21455147
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27531) - you deserved it (2400)

On 08/12/2015 at 9:50am - misc - by Why Me - United States (Washington)

Today, the girl I've loved for years kissed me. Then she started crying and wiping her mouth, and had a panic attack. I had to help her through it, tell her that it was no big deal, and that it would never happen again. FML

Today, I just found my husband on Craigslist. He's working away from home, and he's looking to give a blowjob. FML

#21449578
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26422) - you deserved it (2074)

On 07/30/2015 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I had horrible diarrhea at work. When I felt the bubbling, I ran to the bathroom. An agonizing bowel movement later, I realized that there was no toilet paper in the stall. Just as I was about to ask a coworker who was in the bathroom for some, the fire alarm went off. FML

#21449227
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26611) - you deserved it (1526)

On 07/29/2015 at 8:57pm - health - by Crap (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom told me that she heard me and my best friend in my room grunting and talking about how hard we were. She said she loved me and accepted me no matter what. Thanks mom, but we were working out. FML

#21445547
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24618) - you deserved it (5083)

On 07/22/2015 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my boss that DVI ports are not the same as HDMI ports. When I showed him the HDMI cable, he said, "Oh! You mean USB!" He's an engineering manager. FML

#21445231
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23850) - you deserved it (1471)

On 07/21/2015 at 11:02pm - work - by geek (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML

#21444850
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25494) - you deserved it (2885)

On 07/21/2015 at 2:15am - love - by UnfortunatelySingle (man) - United States (Oregon)



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