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Today, my department found out that we're getting a new supervisor for the third time this month. I joked about how we're like "the foster kid nobody wants." One of my coworkers burst into tears and ran off. I later found out that she had been a foster child and never once had a stable home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28109) - you deserved it (20088)
On 03/19/2013 at 5:59am - work - by Luke - United States (New York)
Today, it's my third night of finally living on my own in a house. I can't count the number of times I have run to my knife and pepper spray after hearing "suspicious" sounds. Maybe I'm not ready to be an adult after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23544) - you deserved it (6246)
On 03/19/2013 at 2:32am - misc - by nearly20yetasfearfulasatoddlerhavingnightmares (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, while working in childcare, we went to a farm so the kids could see how things worked. They started showing off prize winning cattle and when they bought out "Miss Stacey", the kids lost their shit. My name is Miss Stacey. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26670) - you deserved it (1912)
On 03/19/2013 at 1:00am - work - by seriously! - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my superstitious girlfriend of 4 years sneezed in the middle of my proposal. She claimed it was a sign from the universe for us to break up and then immediately left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37049) - you deserved it (409)
On 03/19/2013 at 12:40am - love - by lanz4949 - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I had an interview for a job I really wanted. On my resume, I wrote that I speak conversational Spanish, although I don't. When I arrived for the interview, my interviewer decided to conduct it in Spanish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6159) - you deserved it (64414)
On 03/18/2013 at 7:42pm - work - by nohablaespanol - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me for months. It all started while I was in the hospital, he says, because we were supposed to go out that day, but then I "had to go and get sick". He blames my emergency surgery for his infidelity. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31480) - you deserved it (1857)
On 03/17/2013 at 4:12pm - love - by need an appendickectomy (woman) - Finland
Today, while serving two middle-aged women at the coffee shop, I was screamed at and accused of being a "sexist and chauvinistic bastard." This was prompted by me charging one of them 40 cents for the addition of steamed milk, which is clearly stated on the price sheet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24081) - you deserved it (1384)
On 03/17/2013 at 3:00pm - work - by innocentbarista (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was outside at a café and looked at my phone. When I did, a woman halfway across the patio started screaming at me, demanding I tell her who I was texting and why. She then sprinted over, furious at me for apparently badmouthing her to somebody. All I did was check the time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31862) - you deserved it (2240)
On 03/17/2013 at 7:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, I advised my daughter to not drink a Coke before bed. She smiled at me and reassured me that it could be balanced out with sleeping pills. I'm raising a future drug addict. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26618) - you deserved it (4872)
On 03/17/2013 at 6:25am - kids - by hejdixjeln - United States (Illinois)
Today, I found out through his Facebook update and a text message that my fiancé demoted me to girlfriend status. I was sitting in the next room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26006) - you deserved it (2393)
On 03/17/2013 at 6:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my girlfriend was giving me head during the horror flick we were watching. Little did I know, my girlfriend isn't a big fan of horror films. It was during a sex scene that intensified the moment. The same sex scene from which emerged a sudden jump-scare. I now have bite marks on my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20146) - you deserved it (36336)
On 03/17/2013 at 5:07am - intimacy - by Cliché... or Touché? -
Today, I met my mom's fiancé. He's a nice guy, he's also my wife's dad. I'll soon call my wife my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40427) - you deserved it (2004)
On 03/15/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by guy - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I attended the reading of my grandfather's will. I didn't expect to receive anything, since his side of the family had always ostracized me for being born out of wedlock. I did get something: $3,500, on the binding condition that I use a portion of it to get a vasectomy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29215) - you deserved it (1641)
On 03/14/2013 at 6:04pm - misc - by grandson of a p.o.s. (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I found out why my boyfriend likes to do my hair and makeup for me. Far from it being some kind of fetish or hobby, it's because he thinks I do such a crappy job that feels he has to apply it himself so I don't "embarrass" him when we're out in public together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25046) - you deserved it (8195)
On 03/14/2013 at 5:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)
Today, my pregnancy test came back positive. My boyfriend is no fan of fatherhood, so it was with some hesitation that I called him and let him know I'm pregnant. He replied, "Like hell you are!" and hung up. He now refuses to answer any of my calls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32861) - you deserved it (7330)
On 03/14/2013 at 2:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Monday 17 June 2013
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