XTHEPREDATORX

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XTHEPREDATORX

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  • Number of visits : 2123
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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XTHEPREDATORX's page activity

Visits<b>McNikk</b> - the 04/04/2013 at 11:29am

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XTHEPREDATORX's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend gave me a fortune cookie that said, "Don't be saddened by an upcoming event". Three hours later my girlfriend broke up with me because she said I was too superstitious. FML

by joking0303 / 07/16/2009 at 3:08am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my road test. I'd never had driver's training and my mom taught me how to drive. I failed the test so badly, and when I got home my mom admitted to having taught me how to drive completely wrong because she didn't want me to get my license as she thinks I'm too young. I'm 18. FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2009 at 8:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the mall and had to parallel park. It took me 10 to 12 minutes of maneuvering before I got into the slot. When I turned off the car and got out, there were 8 people laughing hysterically and clapping for me. FML

by greek_dancer / 07/13/2009 at 1:14am / United States / Transportation

Today, I spent hours and hours trying to figure out why the wireless internet on my laptop wasn't working, but everything I tried completely failed. At the end of the day, my older brother came home, and fixed the problem in under 10 seconds by turning the wireless internet switch on. FML

by divineinstrument / 07/12/2009 at 10:46am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Miscellaneous

Today, while going up a ski-lift I accidentally dropped my ticket. The ticket I needed at the top to come back down. I had to hike down the mountain in flip-flops. FML

by Anonymous / 07/03/2009 at 1:47pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was testing for figure skating. I was wearing a brand new custom dress that was a halter top. On my first move, I tripped and fell flat on my face. Immediately after retaking the move, my dress snapped open, exposing myself to the judges. FML

by sk8rgurl / 06/28/2009 at 7:09pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I left my brand new iPod Touch outside. There had been a drought for the past 3 weeks. Not anymore. FML

by Anonymous / 06/28/2009 at 12:47am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that when blender jars aren't locked, they fly off the blender, into the air, hit you in the head and explode all over your kitchen. Today, I also learned that after I'm attacked by a flying blender, the first thing my boyfriend asks is if I'm still gonna make him a smoothie. FML

by lifesmells / 06/26/2009 at 8:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was parking my car outside of my apartment, but the big truck next to the spot went over the line. I squeezed in anyway. Later, I discovered the truck had left and someone keyed my car. They left a note saying, "Good parking job, asshole." FML

by mickstinator / 06/25/2009 at 11:37am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in line at a checkout. I have quite a few facial piercings and 1/2" gauges in my ears. The very heavy cashier asks how big my gauges are and then starts telling me about how she recently got her clitoris pierced and how sometimes she has orgasms behind the register. FML

by toomuchmetal / 06/24/2009 at 3:17pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I was shopping for my little sister's birthday. She loves manga. I've never read manga, so I bought a couple of novels from the "popular" shelf. Turns out if they have white covers it means they are "adult" books. I bought my sister a "lolicon" manga - filled with prebuscent naked girls. FML

by loli-conned / 06/21/2009 at 6:10pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Kids

Today, I had a horrible day at work, came home early and burst into tears as soon as I was in the door. I curled up on the sofa, still bawling, and my cat came over and jumped up for a cuddle. I gave her a hug and she threw up down my back. FML

by Anonymous / 06/15/2009 at 2:11pm / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, my mother found condoms in my room. She asked why and I said, "Just in case." She started laughing hysterically. FML

by Person / 06/07/2009 at 2:07pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I was on the deck of a sailboat and I started feeling seasick. I bent over the edge to throw up. After I stood back up, the wind changed direction and the boon swung around, knocking me into the open ocean. FML

by Timmay / 06/05/2009 at 7:43pm / United States / Health

Today, I was working at my retail job. A customer stopped me on my way to break saying "someone" had broken a snow globe. She showed me where it was and I cleaned it up with her circling me. I finished and put the cleaning supplies away when I heard a 'crash' as the same woman dropped another snow globe. FML

by kilo1_13 / 06/03/2009 at 9:35pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous