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XTHEPREDATORX

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XTHEPREDATORX

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  • Number of visits : 1136
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XTHEPREDATORX's page activity

Visits<b>McNikk</b> - the 04/04/2013 at 11:29am

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XTHEPREDATORX's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in the 'intimacy' section of Walmart. After grabbing 2 boxes of condoms and a vibrating ring I turn around to see my ex boyfriend's mom. I smile awkwardly and put my head down as I walk away, causing me to colide with his dad and send my 'goodies' all over the floor. FML

#5313361
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23093) - you deserved it (6102)

On 09/17/2009 at 2:45pm - intimacy - by RahiYeah09 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on a blind date. We had agreed on meeting in front of a park. Thinking I was there first, I texted her "I'm already there, sitting next to the fat chick." I heard a beep. SHE was the "fat chick." FML

#5292418
334 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19936) - you deserved it (93839)

On 09/16/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by sarahh38 (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend gave me a poem saying "Roses are red, violets are blue, rubbish is dumped and so are you." FML

#5247721
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45903) - you deserved it (3876)

On 09/14/2009 at 5:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, my parents told me they wouldn't be able to afford my senior portraits. That was fine with me, until I found some expensive professional photos in the mail. Of our dog. FML

#5228035
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44857) - you deserved it (2027)

On 09/13/2009 at 12:44pm - animals - by sarahpft (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML

#5148313
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (175477) - you deserved it (18021)

On 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I spent all day at the hospital with my grandma for some tests. When I drove her back home she decided to thank me with $50. Knowing she is unemployed, I told her I couldn't take a whole $50. She replied with "Ungrateful, just like your mother", then took the money and left. FML

#5136505
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33553) - you deserved it (3880)

On 09/08/2009 at 9:22pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I spent hours consoling my girlfriend for getting dumped by the guy she was cheating on me with. FML

#5124019
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27332) - you deserved it (71843)

On 09/08/2009 at 8:29am - love - by nitwit (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, my friends and I went to the beach and we were tanning when I suddenly saw 10 roses floating in the ocean. I went around to pick up all the roses and threw the petals at my friends. Then I notice a big boat of people in black and white were looking at me with disgust. It was a funeral. FML

#5087791
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15424) - you deserved it (47350)

On 09/06/2009 at 7:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was talking to my mom about when I have kids. I told her I may want two or three. She immediately cut me off and told me to stick to one, and that any more than that will be a burden. I am the second born child of my family. FML

#5035693
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36699) - you deserved it (3220)

On 09/04/2009 at 2:30am - misc - by pandabear93 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I tried to wash my cat in the shower, conveniently naked myself. He disapproved, scratching my man-parts and nicking a vein. I just got back from the hospital with a blood infection, swollen nuts, and an hole in my butt where I had to get a shot of antibiotics. FML

#5021908
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14869) - you deserved it (64519)

On 09/03/2009 at 3:55pm - health - by keeperstride (man) - United States (California)

Today, while emailing my very young, attractive teacher to ask a question, my hand slipped. Too bad you can't unsend emails that say "Can we meet after school some time? I have some thongs I'd like to discuss with you." FML

#4956234
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36693) - you deserved it (10154)

On 08/31/2009 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my friend and I went to a bar for drinks. I noticed this cute girl and went over to say "Hi." I had a great conversation with her and I asked for her number before she left. She passed it to me on a piece of paper with instructions specifying for my friend to call her and not me. FML

#4926157
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35778) - you deserved it (2856)

On 08/30/2009 at 8:58am - misc - by hihipanda (man) - Singapore

Today, my mom told me she was getting tired of that smell of marijuana in the house. So I confess and tell her I will never bring it home again. She was talking about my neighbors. FML

#4874504
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12735) - you deserved it (60685)

On 08/28/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by Dumbweed (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while driving, I realized I had left my phone on top of my car when I was getting in. Panicking, I drove back to look for it. I found it in the middle of the street, still intact. Yay! When I went back to my car, I noticed I had locked my door. And the keys were in the ignition. FML

#4866921
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15141) - you deserved it (33896)

On 08/27/2009 at 7:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the girl I have been dating for the past five years asked me to move to California with her to get married. Naturally, I was thrilled and said, "Of course, when do you want to leave?". She just stared at me blankly and said, "Shit, I was kidding." FML



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