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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 26 November 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1114
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About XPlasticSmilesX : I'm a crazy girl with the love for pandas! Oh and by the way i like to nom my friends!!

XPlasticSmilesX's page activity

Visits<b>asmrobots</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 2:05am<b>Ashleigh201</b> - the 06/25/2011 at 5:55pm<b>lolmyendoff456</b> - the 06/21/2011 at 1:42pm

XPlasticSmilesX's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

XPlasticSmilesX's favorite FMLs

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

by Anonymous / 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my friend with me for a radiology scan. While I was getting injections, my friend muttered, "On the bright side, if you die, you'll glow in the dark at the funeral." FML

by radioactiveglowinthedarkthing / 10/10/2011 at 3:06pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Health

Today, my dad came to confiscate my phone. I stuck it in between my boobs so he wouldn't be able to see it. He said, "Honey, your breasts aren't big enough to hide that." FML

by G / 10/08/2011 at 1:03pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a text from someone I've been avoiding saying, "Can I come visit you today?" I replied, "No, sorry, I'm not home." They then replied "Then who is that in your living room?" FML

by Pookaa / 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my pants off and my vibrator still on. I fell asleep masturbating. FML

by 44haley44 / 07/12/2011 at 1:25pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had to make a deal with my 22 year old fiancé. What was the deal? If he put deodorant on, he could squeeze my boob for as long as he liked. FML

by NYMTS / 07/01/2011 at 7:22pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, my dad spent a full half hour trying to convince me that Judaism is a race. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2011 at 6:02pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to comfort my daughter who'd been crying non-stop for hours. She thinks Chuck Norris is coming to kill her, and I can't convince her otherwise. FML

by parenting sucks / 07/01/2011 at 1:42pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my dog died. My parents told me to bury it out back. In the process, I managed to dig up my cat. FML

by Username / 07/01/2011 at 9:05am / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, my wife and I were watching TV. The lady on the show began to talk about how to have a smooth divorce. My wife discreetly turned the volume up. FML

by single / 07/01/2011 at 5:12am / China (Guangdong) / Love

Today, I hired a cleaner to clean my apartment so when my in-laws visited tonight, they wouldn't think I was lazy. I got home from work, the cleaner hadn't shown at all, and my in-laws had arrived early. My mother-in-law is now mopping the floors. FML

by gypsy / 06/23/2011 at 10:00pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I woke up to see my drunk mother passed out on our couch. She was just wearing socks. FML

by RedheadA / 06/16/2011 at 10:24am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son's homework was to write a story about what he wants to be when he grows up. He wrote that he plans on being unemployed and living at home until we throw him out, then he'll live under a bridge. He's only 12, but already planning for a future as an unemployed bum. FML

by Seriously / 06/15/2011 at 12:46pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was walking to class, when a kid came up behind me and smacked me in the face a few times until I fell to the ground. I rolled over and he said, "Oh shit! Wrong person, my bad." FML

by Braxam / 06/15/2011 at 12:42pm / United States / Health

Today, I was in my family's hotel room taking a dump. The lock to the bathroom was broken so we had made a deal: when the door is closed, someone is using the toilet. The maid didn't know that. She punched me in the face because she claimed I scared her. FML

by Anonymous / 06/15/2011 at 9:37am / Denmark (Sjelland) / Miscellaneous