About XDsmileyDX : Hey guys. Ryan here. My main purpose on FML is to have my day brightened by other people getting theirs destroyed.
I enjoy film making and doing parkour. If you would like to check out works of my film making, you can find my videos on YouTube at www.youtube.com/perilouspictures.
If you would like to check out works of my parkour... well... find me on the streets somewhere.
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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43148) - you deserved it (11803)
On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, at work, I misheard a customer telling me a story. To be polite, I did a slight laugh and nodded my head. She actually told me her mum had died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17735) - you deserved it (14069)
On 10/19/2011 at 1:38am - work - by derbyboy - United Kingdom (Derby)
Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42790) - you deserved it (6047)
On 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Mini-wanker (man) - United States (New York)
Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35503) - you deserved it (7643)
On 10/18/2011 at 11:01am - intimacy - by imy - United States (Texas)
Today, for our 3rd anniversary, I gave my boyfriend a watch, courtesy of Rolex. He gave me herpes, courtesy of his other girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43099) - you deserved it (3423)
On 10/18/2011 at 10:16am - health - by stdpositivenow (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was given an entire week of detention for planking on my school desk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12169) - you deserved it (53580)
On 10/17/2011 at 6:05pm - misc - by planking champion (woman) - United States (North Dakota)
Today, I went to a concert. I got into a fist fight with a drunk girl. My older brother tried to pull me away from her by holding both my arms back. I spent the last half of the concert in the hospital because I couldn't shield my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25603) - you deserved it (6486)
On 10/17/2011 at 10:14am - misc - by alliegator_13 - United States
Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36686) - you deserved it (2609)
On 10/17/2011 at 1:44am - intimacy - by pokeballbra - United States (Texas)
Today, I was in a public restroom. The guy in the urinal next to me was making loud sounds of discomfort. I ignored him and finished up. I turned around to be greeted by his red swollen beehive of a crotch, and him asking "Is my penis supposed to look like this?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28310) - you deserved it (1746)
On 10/17/2011 at 12:20am - health - by blarp - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I found ants all over my chocolate, but I'm so addicted that I just wiped them off and ate it anyway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5549) - you deserved it (37961)
Today, while reading over my sent application email to a job I have been trying to get, I found out my brother had put "Heil Hitler!" as my signature. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29965) - you deserved it (3669)
On 10/16/2011 at 3:15am - work - by Unemployed - United States (Oregon)
Today, I came home to my empty apartment. My girlfriend had left a note on the floor that said: "Took my stuff and left. Took your stuff and pawned it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31438) - you deserved it (4279)
On 10/16/2011 at 12:22am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, while jogging in the park, I saw a man acting strange and trying to talk to 3 little girls. I jogged over to their mother and warned her about a 'weirdo' lurking around her daughters. Turns out that 'weirdo' is the woman's disabled brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21835) - you deserved it (12795)
On 10/15/2011 at 9:13pm - misc - by cristina_laila (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I saw an unbelievably cute guy. He caught my eye and began to walk towards me. I adjusted myself and flashed him a smile. He came up to me, smiled back, and said "Hi, do you have a minute for gay rights?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29366) - you deserved it (5603)
On 10/15/2011 at 2:58am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was driving my eight year-old son to school when a guy cut me off, prompting me to yell "douche bag" as a reflex out of the window. Realizing my mistake, I turned to my son and told him to never, ever talk like that. His response was, "Too late, douche bag." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9006) - you deserved it (29773)
On 10/12/2011 at 8:37am - kids - by John W. (man) - United States (Colorado)
Friday 24 May 2013
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