Wolstenholme

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Offline (the 02/06/2015 at 7:22pm)

Wolstenholme

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4252
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Wolstenholme : Geoff > Gavin > Ryan > Ray > Michael > Jack SORRY JACK! STILL LOVE YA BUDDY!

Wolstenholme's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 10:26am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 3:17pm<b>bigredmonkeybutt</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 7:59pm<b>BaconIsMySavior</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 1:30pm<b>mcaisse77</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 7:25am<b>Angelkisses130</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 5:22am<b>GuessWut</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 1:49am<b>abattior</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 6:08pm<b>Brinibaby13</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 2:27pm<b>kelsorg</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:51pm<b>cwhitt975</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:24pm<b>wondercat40</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 12:54pm<b>Earrings100</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 4:30pm<b>4EverMarie</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 5:16pm<b>aFuckinDeathwish</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 10:03am<b>jen1682</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 3:08am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 5:39am<b>emxy92</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 5:17pm

Wolstenholme's FML badges

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Wolstenholme's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandmother told me that since my dad was a mistake, I too am a mistake. FML

by 2ndgenoration / 05/17/2014 at 5:56pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I retrieved the wrong luggage from an airport carousel. I'm now the owner of two water-bras, a false beard, a bag of cat litter, and some anal beads. I am afraid to get in touch with the original owner. FML

by BaggedDown / 05/07/2014 at 9:25pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at my brother's funeral, my girlfriend decided to tell me she's been sleeping with him. FML

by loserman / 04/29/2014 at 6:40pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I bought my niece a plush My Little Pony figure for her birthday. Only after she unwrapped it did I realize that it was meant to be a sex toy for grown men. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2014 at 1:57am / Canada / Kids

Today, my drunken self became a vaguely racist poet. I am now the author of a four-page poem entitled "Chocolate Men". FML

by chocochoco / 03/23/2014 at 11:40pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend decided it was time to spice up our sex life. He now watches Sons Of Anarchy when we have sex. FML

by Anonymous / 03/19/2014 at 10:43pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was excited to see a spider skittering across my bathroom floor, because this one was real and not a hallucination. FML

Today, while having a sneak through my brother's browser, I found a bookmark for a Google Docs file. It was a short story involving him horrifically killing our entire family. It ended with the words: "And that is what happens when people don't respect the author's privacy." FML

by well SHIT / 02/27/2014 at 4:46pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a family reunion. I laughed at my uncle's Sylvester Stallone impression. Turns out he had a stroke a while back. FML

by heyadrian / 02/20/2014 at 11:06am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I found a Google search for "erectile dysfunction" in my browser search history, along with pages about treatments for it. I'm a woman, and I live alone. FML

by jai90 / 02/03/2014 at 4:16pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm a 34 year old male who just got given the sex talk on my Facebook timeline by my senile mother. 5ML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2014 at 8:29pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my younger brother asked if he could watch me put a tampon in. He's 17. FML

by ugh / 01/16/2014 at 8:37am / Vietnam (Ha Noi) / Intimacy

Today, it's been a little over a month since my dad started taking yoga lessons. We always joked around behind his back that he was just doing it so he could get flexible enough to suck himself off. Well, that joke was confirmed as reality when I walked in on him trying just that. FML

by bleach bleach bleach / 12/22/2013 at 12:22pm / United States (Nevada) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via a sign he made in front of my Minecraft house. FML

by back to creepers / 12/21/2013 at 3:05pm / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Geek

Today, my class was interrupted by flowers, balloons and chocolates. Then he sang to me a song he wrote himself. This was all for our one-year anniversary. It probably would have been the best day of my life... if I knew who he was. FML

by romance sucks. / 12/18/2013 at 4:20pm / United States (Ohio) / Love