Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Wiringify

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

Wiringify

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 21962
  • Number of comments : 75
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Wiringify : Live.

On FML everyday.

Love the app.

Wiringify's page activity

Visits<b>HRowan</b> - yesterday at 12:05am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 6:58pm<b>brieee</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 1:32pm<b>arasx0</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 4:36pm<b>bazookajoey</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 9:24pm<b>kaed</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 10:43am<b>Just_A_Tree</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 3:21am<b>ZachHatesPeople</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 12:21pm<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 10:12am<b>swanheart</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 3:02am<b>ezrajab</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 11:11am<b>Khaleesi_26</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 10:38am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 11:10pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 10:49pm<b>xwingtwo</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 9:23pm<b>DorLeon</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 9:06pm<b>PixieWolfe</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 4:14am<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 9:40pm

Liked!<b>swanheart</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 9:02am<b>brieee</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 7:23pm

Wiringify's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of Wiringify's badges

Wiringify's favorite FMLs

Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML

#21362166
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35759) - you deserved it (2794)

On 02/23/2015 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by sammy18f (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I ordered Chinese and told them I was allergic to eggs. I took a bite and I found some egg, quickly spat it out and took my antihistamines. When I returned with it and complained about my potential demise, they gave me a free orange to apologise. I'm allergic to oranges. FML

#21361977
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29869) - you deserved it (5009)

On 02/23/2015 at 7:08pm - health - by hatemebeforetheyevenhatch (woman) - United Kingdom (West Dunbartonshire)

Today, my wedding venue called and canceled our reservation because we were double booked with a spaghetti bingo night, which they felt was more important. FML

#21361818
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33210) - you deserved it (2519)

On 02/23/2015 at 3:49pm - misc - by looking4newvenue (woman) - United States

Today, I'm sick with a stomach flu. For the last 5 hours, I've been going back and forth from the couch to the bathroom. Each time I get into the bathroom, I have to make a choice of whether to sit on the toilet or kneel by it. Each time I have to clean up the other mess. FML

#21361729
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31143) - you deserved it (5185)

On 02/23/2015 at 12:56pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, away at college, I called my grandmother to hear how she was doing after her knee surgery. She ended up talking about Hooters and how I should work there because of my "rare body". When I mentioned I've been studying computer science, earning a 3.8 GPA, she replied, "But you're a girl." FML

#21361518
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34519) - you deserved it (2902)

On 02/23/2015 at 2:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I hit my head on the steering wheel when I sneezed. I managed to honk the horn and the guy next to me couldn't stop laughing. FML

#21361311
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31781) - you deserved it (4520)

On 02/22/2015 at 8:41pm - misc - by headache - United States

Today, I competed in a Tae Kwon Do competition. I came third with my team in the sparring event. My mum said as a joke, "Were there only 3 teams?" There were. FML

#21361215
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28264) - you deserved it (3889)

On 02/22/2015 at 6:21pm - misc - by tom28402 - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

#21361122
460 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44302) - you deserved it (4015)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I decided to go all-natural and go to work without any makeup on. My boss swore I was on drugs, which I guess had absolutely nothing to do with the completely "random" drug test I had to take later in the day. FML

#21361118
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32042) - you deserved it (3116)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:36pm - work - by vaylosa (woman) -

Today, my boyfriend complimented me on how he liked my freckles down below. I didn't have the heart to tell him that they were just razor rash. FML

#21360762
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29359) - you deserved it (3995)

On 02/22/2015 at 12:15am - intimacy - by awkward.. (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's 1 year old. FML

#21360646
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33347) - you deserved it (2329)

On 02/21/2015 at 9:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dad gave my younger brother condoms and a pat on the back, even though he doesn't have a girlfriend. This is after called me a whore after he saw me kissing my long-term boyfriend last week. FML

#21360278
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36411) - you deserved it (2633)

On 02/21/2015 at 8:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I witnessed the beautiful sight of a tiny baby bird struggling to take flight from its nest. "You can do it," I muttered, which I guess my asswipe of a cat heard as "Quick, go kill that bird and scar me for life, please." FML

#21360123
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28381) - you deserved it (3754)

On 02/20/2015 at 11:25pm - animals - by tulisa (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, three days after finally having a bed to sleep on, I woke up with multiple bedbug bites. I can't use my blankets, wear any of my clothes and it's back to sleeping on the floor for me. FML

#21360063
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26765) - you deserved it (2125)

On 02/20/2015 at 9:54pm - animals - by fml (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mom told me that, even though my brother sells drugs, he's still her favorite child. FML

#21359996
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32587) - you deserved it (2685)

On 02/20/2015 at 7:35pm - misc - by pissed - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • Sidonie's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! In this week's edition, some pedalos, some kittens, a bunch of gypsy singers, some ponytails, a crooner, a house that looks like Hitler, a joke about George W. Bush's cocaine habit and a brilliant…

Thursday 19 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: