Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Wiringify

Search for a member

Wiringify
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3062
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Wiringify : Live.

On FML everyday.

Love the app.

Wiringify's last visitors

DMAN80182001buckdharmaCandyDawgDumonster_16AdiedeeLuluRichardsorigamidragonSlammer20120void0SHEwolfeealexmac222

Wiringify's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Wiringify's badges

Wiringify's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom brought her sleazy boyfriend home. He took one look at me, swatted my ass, and said, "It runs in the family." My mom just laughed and winked at me, and mouthed, "He's a keeper!" FML

#21103666
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50109) - you deserved it (3223)

On 04/03/2014 at 1:22pm - love - by wiona (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my grandmother is coming over to my family's house to stay for about a week or so. Apparently, the guest room window isn't big enough for her dream catcher, so she wants her cat to sleep in the guest room and she wants to sleep in my room. My parents support this. FML

#21103236
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38604) - you deserved it (3090)

On 04/02/2014 at 10:25pm - misc - by themonesterman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was working at a coffee shop. I was serving a customer when a cockroach appeared out of nowhere, and I screamed. Customers aren't supposed to know about the bugs so I had to lie and say I spilled coffee on myself, and served the customer while I felt the bug climbing up my leg. FML

Today, my 14-year-old son's pathetic rebellion came to a head. He ran away from home, leaving a note saying he hates me and was leaving forever to be part of a gang his friends had formed. He came back an hour later crying. His whole gang had gotten mugged, which he somehow blamed me for. FML

#21102946
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43819) - you deserved it (5061)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:10pm - kids - by I Have Failed (man) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, my students all handed in their 1,000 word papers. The assignment was for them to write about a strong, benevolent leader who influenced the world. Around half of the papers were about Hitler. FML

#21102694
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37781) - you deserved it (8640)

On 04/02/2014 at 7:30am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I discovered that the laser disc player I used to have was not in fact a laser disc player but a Pioneer Laseractive. Broken ones sell on eBay for $200 and working ones sell for around $1000. I sold a working one for less than $100-worth of credit at a second-hand store. FML

#21102658
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32508) - you deserved it (15385)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:20am - misc - by Sad Nerd (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had to tell my daughter that just because markers say "washable", it doesn't mean that you can draw all over our newly-painted walls. She's 15. FML

#21102656
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37390) - you deserved it (5260)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:16am - kids - by IcyWinter - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, for our 25th anniversary, my husband and I had dinner on a cruise ship, a dinner we had been planning for months. Upon boarding, I realized the expensive dress that I had bought just for the occasion had exactly the same print as the chair covers and the carpet. The cruise lasted 8 hours. FML

#21102655
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37597) - you deserved it (5256)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:13am - misc - by Why (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I have pink eye. Four weeks ago I had scabies. I'm an elementary school teacher, and I'm apparently under attack from biological weapons: my students. FML

#21102371
93 comments

Today, I had to rush my 14-year-old son to the hospital after he fell out of a tree while trying to take an obnoxious "extreme selfie". FML

#21102110
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40960) - you deserved it (4726)

On 04/01/2014 at 5:41pm - kids - by derped-out sperm (man) - Ireland

Today, I was dismissed from my job at an unemployment agency. In order to receive financial support from the government I need to be cooperating with a job service provider. They paired me up with the same place I was just fired from. FML

#21101310
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36489) - you deserved it (2968)

On 03/31/2014 at 8:43pm - misc - by awks - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. Not only was he boring, he twice excused himself to go to the bathroom and both times he came back smelling of weed. FML

#21101191
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35792) - you deserved it (5331)

On 03/31/2014 at 6:05pm - love - by Jaime - United States (New York)

Today, my Game of Thrones addicted girlfriend decided to name my penis Tyrion Lannister. FML

#21101155
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34499) - you deserved it (5274)

On 03/31/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by off to the whorehouse, then (man) - United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove)

Today, while on patrol with my partner, we came across a guy getting a beat-down on the sidewalk. After restraining the attacker, we helped the victim to his feet, only for him to spit at us and call us "goddamn pigs". You're welcome, sir. FML

#21101111
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38753) - you deserved it (3548)

On 03/31/2014 at 4:07pm - work - by dunno why we bother (man) - United States (Florida)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: