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WingsFan80's favorite FMLs
by FMyLife5915 / 09/04/2010 at 12:15am / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML
by FYouBoyfriend / 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
by soldierboy / 08/29/2010 at 8:39pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend asked me how big the Sun would be compared to the Earth. I didn't have anything on me to help demonstrate, so to imitate the Earth, I made a small hole with my index finger and thumb and said "Okay, imagine a ball this small." She then looked at my crotch. FML
by Anonymous / 08/27/2010 at 8:23am / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy
by weddinggirl / 08/27/2010 at 5:57am / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Love
Today, at a restaurant, I was joking around trying to make my friend laugh by pretending to be a ninja. I did this by putting my napkin in front of my face. I happened to look over at another table and saw that a lady wearing a burqa was giving me the most evil glare I have ever seen in my life. FML
by CrushAdrenaline / 08/27/2010 at 5:46am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was driving home with my dad after buying a new truck. We were on the freeway and the engine wasn't revving up very much. My dad thought that something was wrong with my transmission, so he reached over to change gears. Most cars won't go into reverse at high speeds. Mine does. FML
by Anonymous / 08/23/2010 at 7:28pm / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, I was reaching for something in the back of the refrigerator. The bottle of hot sauce that was in front of it fell and broke. Not only did the glass cut my feet up, but the hot sauce got in the fresh wounds. FML
by fiery / 07/23/2010 at 8:06pm / United States (Florida) / Health
by magnolia / 07/13/2010 at 10:10pm / United States (Tennessee) / Work
Today, my boyfriend and I thought it'd be hot to have it off on the golf course once it was dark. Who would've thought that sprinklers start up once it's pitch dark. I got a lot wetter than I thought I would. FML
by Anonymous / 07/13/2010 at 4:31am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…