About Wilffe56 : I decided Wilffe56 instead of Wolffe for some random reason...
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Wilffe56's favorite FMLs
by ugh / 01/23/2016 at 3:48pm / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, I set my cup of coffee down on the stall floor to take care of my business. A hand reached under the stall door and took my coffee. I yelled to give it back, calling them obscene names. Moments later, my fresh coffee came flying over the door. I'm burned from my head to my legs. FML
by CoffeeStained / 11/10/2015 at 10:54am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/14/2015 at 10:29am / United States (California) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/13/2015 at 3:35am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my best friend told me how his batshit insane girlfriend keeps questioning his sexuality and thinks we're screwing behind her back. He's so desperate for a relationship that he's decided to stop hanging out with me. Goodbye 7 years of friendship. FML
by Anonymous / 10/12/2015 at 10:29am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Miscellaneous
Today, a 60 year old veteran hit on me by pointing to his white hair and saying: "Just because there's snow on the roof doesn't mean there isn't a fire down below." Then he told me vets eat free at Cracker Barrel. FML
by Bex98 / 09/28/2015 at 12:31pm / United States (California) / Love
by DSCC / 09/27/2015 at 11:07pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals
Today, I was driving to work and stopped at a stop light. A full 2 or 3 seconds passed, followed by a car rear-ending me. The idiot driving it got out and gave me hell, calling me a maniac because I braked "too quickly" and didn't give him a chance to react. FML
by WTF / 09/27/2015 at 3:57am / Poland (Dolnoslaskie) / Miscellaneous
Today, after my sister's wedding, a bunch of people were dancing. I noticed my grandma sitting alone and looking sad. My grandpa died last month, so feeling bad for her, I asked if she'd like to dance with me. She seemed a lot happier, until I accidentally caused her to fall and break her arm. FML
by JT / 09/26/2015 at 9:08am / Luxembourg / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/07/2015 at 10:21am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 09/06/2015 at 4:11pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I met my Canadian friend at the airport. As we were heading into the city, I told him not to worry about all the US stereotypes and that gun crime in my city is rare. A few hours later, we witnessed a guy get shot in the street in broad daylight. Now he's too scared to leave the house. FML
by fuckyoudeadgunnuts / 09/04/2015 at 10:30am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was getting ready to go out with my family. As I was putting my phone in my purse, my father told me I wouldn't need it because we were going to spend 'quality time' together. The entire time I was there, everyone was staring at their phone. I was the only one without one. FML
by idk / 09/04/2015 at 10:15am / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Miscellaneous
by kp / 09/03/2015 at 12:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML
by Anonymous / 08/30/2015 at 11:44am / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…
- Today, my girlfriend found my list of women I've had sex with, complete with the ratings I'd given… Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the… Today, my husband and I were getting frisky. All was going well until I decided to go down on him,…