Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

WickedAwsum

Search for a member

WickedAwsum

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 21 December 1990 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 38583
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About WickedAwsum : I love writing and playing soccer. I have a huge interest in technology and engineering. I am a very quiet person, but that doesn't mean I don't talk.

WickedAwsum's page activity

Visits<b>teotsi</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 9:28am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 12:05am<b>briannahmaree</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 9:22pm<b>jasonmar</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 12:18am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:24pm<b>Apparatus333</b> - the 06/07/2010 at 9:41am<b>BaBiiSpAnKy821</b> - the 12/19/2009 at 10:54pm<b>JustSoLost</b> - the 12/05/2009 at 1:44am<b>ILIEKGIRLS</b> - the 11/30/2009 at 12:46am<b>wtfismyfml</b> - the 11/25/2009 at 4:03pm<b>drainyou123</b> - the 11/23/2009 at 2:18pm<b>klutzilla1275</b> - the 11/14/2009 at 1:21am<b>DoveOrHawk</b> - the 11/08/2009 at 10:12pm<b>evgevg</b> - the 11/06/2009 at 10:49am<b>nando92</b> - the 11/04/2009 at 6:26pm<b>Daaniellee1234</b> - the 11/04/2009 at 6:25pm<b>Yuppie</b> - the 10/23/2009 at 10:17pm<b>Fentown</b> - the 10/09/2009 at 5:00pm

WickedAwsum's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

WickedAwsum's favorite FMLs

Today, after the church service was over, my two year old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang " Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

#2076493
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59678) - you deserved it (8445)

On 05/19/2009 at 10:04am - kids - by nana (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear. "Mom?" I called out instinctively, recalling how she always smells like peppermint. The hand stopped rubbing, and I turned to face my very disgusted looking girlfriend of three years. FML

#2005903
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28419) - you deserved it (85106)

On 05/17/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by Ohshit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, one of my three-year-old twin daughters asked, "Dad, can we get a cat?" I replied in a gentle dad voice, "No, honey, dad is allergic to cats. That means they make him sneeze and sniffle. So we can't get a cat. Sorry." After a slight pause, the other asked, "When you die can we get a cat?" FML

#1927832
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61870) - you deserved it (5790)

On 05/14/2009 at 11:24am - kids - by TwinDad (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was taking a bath and needed shampoo. I leaned on the soap holder to get some and it came off the wall. Huge ants started pouring out running up the walls, down the walls, EVERYWHERE. I ran out of the bathroom screaming, completely naked. FML

#1862791
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76947) - you deserved it (6040)

On 05/12/2009 at 12:19am - misc - by Karmas3itch - United States (Ohio)

Today, my parents hosted a party at our house. After seeing one of the extremely beautiful guests, I went to masturbate in my room. When I was about to finish, my bedroom door opened suddenly. It was my mom showing around 10 party guests that our dog can open doors. FML

#1791192
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23377) - you deserved it (79101)

On 05/09/2009 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by Jeremy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking to class with my roommate. She didn't notice the car coming up behind her because her headphones were in. As I pulled her out of the way, she thought I was goofing around and shoved me back... in front of the car. I got hit and rolled off the hood. FML

#1719560
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (114775) - you deserved it (5640)

On 05/07/2009 at 3:11pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Toscana)

Today, I was walking to class with my roommate. She didn't notice the car coming up behind her because her headphones were in. As I pulled her out of the way, she thought I was goofing around and shoved me back... in front of the car. I got hit and rolled off the hood. FML

#1719560
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (114775) - you deserved it (5640)

On 05/07/2009 at 3:11pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Toscana)

Today, I saw my neighbor's son mowing their lawn when suddenly he started to do this crazy dance. Chuckling at his antics I waved and walked back into my house. His mom called me from a hospital later to ask if I could put the mower away; he had been attacked by bees. FML

#1643455
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18637) - you deserved it (42699)

On 05/04/2009 at 8:46pm - kids - by Jon (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee table. Bored, I lit one, and after a minute I threw it away and sat back down on the couch. I started looking at the box and noticed that it said "Magic Re-Lighting Candles" at the exact moment that my trash can burst into flames. FML

#1631197
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25708) - you deserved it (69739)

On 05/04/2009 at 4:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while teaching my kindergarten class, I had a feeling I was starting my period again. A boy in the class asked me what a period was. Stressing over my own, I briefly told him it's a woman's time of the month when they have mood swings. He was asking about the dot at the end of a sentence. FML

#880464
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42710) - you deserved it (35674)

On 04/09/2009 at 12:53am - kids - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw a friend in the street but he didn't see me, so as a joke I decided to ring him. He took his mobile out of his pocket, sighed and didn't pick up. FML

#1016
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30510) - you deserved it (2755)

On 01/12/2009 at 9:47pm - misc - by patty - Sent from mobile version



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: