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Offline (the 03/21/2014 at 7:11am)

WelcomeToAndale

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 29 January 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6220
  • Number of comments : 120
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About WelcomeToAndale : Big Fallout 3 & New Vegas fan.

WelcomeToAndale's page activity

Visits<b>meunluckycharms</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 4:58pm<b>NoName011</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 6:57pm<b>llamingo</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 2:45pm<b>TypicalDaniela</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 7:53am<b>_Heisenberg__</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 9:06am<b>bingo__O</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 12:35am<b>dipsheep</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 12:55pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 3:27am<b>Treken</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 8:00am<b>BellaBelle</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 11:39am<b>little_aliceee</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 10:38am<b>LiterOfCola</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 3:20am<b>Maxoubinouchou</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 3:15pm<b>spolin124</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 3:03pm<b>The_Railgun</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 12:16am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 11:40am<b>WaywardDaughter</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 6:38pm<b>Ins0mau</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 5:31pm

WelcomeToAndale's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of WelcomeToAndale's badges

WelcomeToAndale's favorite FMLs

Today, while at a private lake, my colon declared a state of evacuation. I ventured as far from my family as my sphincter would allow, only to make eye contact with two very horrified kayakers mid-explosion. FML

by Oh-Shit! / 08/10/2013 at 11:23am / United States / Health

Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML

by fired / 08/09/2013 at 6:17pm / Work

Today, I asked out a guy at work that I really like. He just stared at me and said, "Honestly? I'd rather smash my balls with a mallet. No offense." FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2013 at 10:54am / France / Love

Today, I let my son take my car out for a spin, since he just got his licence. He didn't make it out of our street before totaling it. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2013 at 10:22am / Canada (British Columbia) / Transportation

Today, I stopped at a red light, when I noticed the car in front of me was in reverse. I honked at the driver, hoping he'd realize and place the car in drive. He thought the light turned green and immediately backed into me. FML

by please don't back that thing up / 08/09/2013 at 1:00am / United States / Transportation

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

by JuggaloSlasher15 / 08/08/2013 at 7:03pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I ran into my shitlord of an ex at the store. He took one look at me, yelled "You cheating bitch!" in a wounded voice, then walked away, fake-crying. I got so many dirty looks. The worst part is that I dumped him last month for cheating on me with my "best friend." FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2013 at 5:18pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend was suspended from work after she was caught fucking one of her co-workers. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2013 at 4:20pm / United Kingdom (Slough) / Love

Today, I actually had to explain to two of my friends that neither Alaska nor Nebraska are in Canada. I think I need new friends. FML

by ROBERT / 08/08/2013 at 2:52pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, my fiancé asked for money to bail his brother out of jail, the same brother who happily spent a whole day recently trying to convince my fiancé that I've been cheating on him with my own cousin. So I said no. He shook his head in disgust and said that I'm "unbelievably spiteful". FML

by go choke on a gonad / 08/08/2013 at 9:13am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I confessed my feelings to the guy I've had the biggest crush on. He spent the next ten minutes calling me delusional, said that I know nothing about him, and laughed that "this isn't Twilight, for fuck's sake". All he did when I started crying was pat me on the head and leave. FML

by names suck and so do I / 08/08/2013 at 8:54am / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Love

Today, I asked my mum why she never had any children after me. She scoffed and asked if I've looked in a mirror lately. FML

by noiguessitsbroken :( / 08/07/2013 at 8:24am / Lithuania (Kauno Apskritis) / Miscellaneous

Today, during an otherwise promising job interview, I was asked how much I thought was too much for a "good hit of blow". I must have stayed speechless for too long, because the guy's next words were, "Yeah, you're not cut out for this." I'm shocked and baffled too. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2013 at 6:49am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I was video chatting with my boyfriend and his friends. When I stood up, he told his friend "See, she's not a twig!" I jokingly replied with, "So I'm fat?" After a few seconds of silence, his friend yelled, "It's a trap!" and left the chat. FML

by ImNotFat / 08/07/2013 at 2:04am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

by Blood on my hands / 08/07/2013 at 1:40am / United States / Animals