About Weetart : I swear like a fucking trucker, that's about it.
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Weetart's favorite FMLs
by skiittlez713 / 05/20/2011 at 4:40am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/11/2011 at 1:32pm / Canada / Miscellaneous
Today, having turned 18, I was eager to show my mother some of the clothes I'd like to purchase with my birthday money. I flipped my laptop open only to realise I had left a "Big Latina Booty gets a fat one" window open. Her howling screams of pleasure echoed through my kitchen. FML
by Anon / 05/07/2011 at 2:08am / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Intimacy
Today, I was sitting with my crush at lunch. Trying to flirt, I tried to stare seductively into his eyes while sucking on my straw. I missed. The straw shot straight up my nose, causing me the worst nose bleed of my life. FML
by littlegirl / 05/07/2011 at 12:46am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
Today, I thought I heard someone shifting around in my house. I froze in fear and then I heard it again. I thought I was hearing things until I realized that it wasn't an intruder in my home. The shifting noise was my thighs rubbing together when I walked. FML
by Celluloid / 04/29/2011 at 2:52am / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/29/2011 at 2:29am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/26/2011 at 8:26am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, after months of living with my roommate's horrific snoring, I looked over to see her sleeping quietly. Elated that I might actually get a full night of rest for once, I went to bed. Just as my eyelids began to droop, she started making vile hissing sounds. Yes, hissing. FML
by turnedintoinsomniac / 01/21/2011 at 2:46pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML
by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 11:44am / Switzerland / Health
Today, I was working in a restaurant. I stopped to pick up some silverware a customer dropped. Apparently my belt wasn't tight enough because a woman behind me immediately hurled in disgust. On top of being found revolting, I'm now in trouble for "flashing" someone. FML
by Anonymous / 01/10/2011 at 1:45am / United States / Work
Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML
by Anonymous / 12/28/2010 at 10:39am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Transportation
by fme / 12/08/2010 at 9:34am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I decided to take a nap in the university library. I felt like I'd only closed my eyes for a minute, when a guy woke me up to tell me that I'd been farting in my sleep for the last half hour, and that the librarian was becoming concerned. FML
by Anonymous / 12/06/2010 at 5:53pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in McDonalds with some friends. When I got up to the register to order, the guy there appeared startled by me, and said, 'Whoa, you're really pretty.' No one has ever said anything like that to me before. When I told my friends, they laughed and said, 'Wow. He must have been drunk.' FML
by ugly / 11/14/2010 at 2:39am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. I was on their bed having sex with their… Today, my boyfriend got a new tattoo. It was a big tattoo of Pikachu on his hip. I told him now I'd… Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just…