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This member hasn't filled in the description.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I saw an attractive man outside the club I was trying to get into to. We talked, and ended up having sex in my apartment. The next day when I was dropping him off, I discovered he was homeless and was outside the club begging for money. My house is suddenly out of bread and cheese. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23376) - you deserved it (99899)
On 03/18/2009 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by Melaknee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was flirting with a really hot guy at a track meet and I gave him my number. When I asked him what school he went to he replied, "Oh, I don't go to school, We're from the juvenile corrections facility." FML
I agree, your life sucks (51762) - you deserved it (16849)
On 03/17/2009 at 10:42am - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (California)
Today, walking from class to my apartment, I was mugged and had my wallet, phone, and backpack taken from me. As I handed my stuff over I angrily muttered "you're taking everything from but my shoes", under my breath. The asshole heard me, looked down, and demanded my sneakers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39139) - you deserved it (47286)
On 03/17/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by Noname - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was teaching a swimming lesson to 6-7 year old boys and girls. I recently broke up with my boyfriend so I haven't been taking care of my bikini line. While I was demonstrating how to do a whip-kick out of the water one of the boys said, "You have a beard coming out of your bathing suit!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32513) - you deserved it (50425)
On 03/14/2009 at 10:27pm - kids - by superfkd (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was walking down the street and noticed a man in ripped clothes with a cup out asking for money. I was on my way to the movies but I felt like this man needed it more that me. Right as I gave it to him, he pulled out his blackberry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50413) - you deserved it (12957)
On 03/14/2009 at 4:55pm - money - by california (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my Christian boyfriend of six months broke up with me. I had told him when we started dating that I was an atheist, and he just now decided to look up what it is. He gave me a bible. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58859) - you deserved it (11790)
On 03/14/2009 at 12:48pm - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11509) - you deserved it (85409)
On 03/14/2009 at 7:05am - love - by DSM (man) - United States (North Dakota)
Today, my friends and I were drinking boba. On the side of the cup it said "Please drink carefully to avoid choking on the Boba". I started to laugh at the ridiculousness of the label, and choked on the boba in a coughing fit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9571) - you deserved it (51597)
On 03/13/2009 at 12:24am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was on the subway. I have fairly serious OCD, so I avoided holding the poles or handles. All the seats were taken, so I leaned against a wall. At the next stop, an obese, sweaty man got on and grabbed the two poles around me, effectively hugging me. My shirt was wet when he left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61291) - you deserved it (4079)
On 03/13/2009 at 12:00am - misc - by Anon (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was babysitting an eleven year old boy. He decided we should play with nerf guns with velcro tips. I shot him in the crotch accidentally, and the dart stuck on his pants wiggling for about a full minute before his dad walked in to find us both staring at his son's crotch, giggling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36674) - you deserved it (9398)
On 03/09/2009 at 10:04pm - kids - by xoVioLoveox (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I tried to surprise my parents by coming home from college for Spring Break. I arrived to find a dark house, with all the doors bolted shut. After calling them, I found out that they have gone on a vacation to Hawaii for a week. I am now locked out of my own house, with no where to stay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37534) - you deserved it (9033)
On 03/09/2009 at 1:50am - misc - by Abandoned (man) - United States (California)
Today, I finally told my best friend whom I've secretly been in love with for two years that I was in love with her but at the last second chickened out and said I was joking. She replied with "Don't scare me like that. I thought i was going to have to find a new best friend for a second" FML
I agree, your life sucks (53354) - you deserved it (4961)
On 03/06/2009 at 11:17pm - love - by crap (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was working at Target when an old woman asked me if I could help her find her favorite bra. I asked what brand it was when she replied "I'll check the tag". She lifted up the front of her shirt, and flipped one cup of her bra inside out. I saw everything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52117) - you deserved it (2863)
On 03/06/2009 at 6:11pm - work - by laurenmay (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was at the dentist getting a cavity filled. As she's drilling into my tooth, I feel the drill slip, and then she quickly stuffs gauze into my mouth. She nervously laughs and says to me "Wow! You must really be numb!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (101859) - you deserved it (2933)
On 03/06/2009 at 5:20pm - health - by Noname (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I flew home early from a two month trip to Europe to surprise my boyfriend on his birthday. When I got to his house with a home baked cake from scratch and a quilt with slik-screened pictures from my trip, his roommate answered the door and said "Oh sorry, he's out with his girlfriend." FML
I agree, your life sucks (51648) - you deserved it (2436)
On 03/06/2009 at 4:07pm - love - by Muscle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
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