Waffleman44

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Offline (the 10/01/2015 at 2:54pm)

Waffleman44

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1049
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Waffleman44's page activity

Visits<b>Shmatterhorn</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 12:04am<b>hadleigh_24601</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 12:46am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 10:45pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 4:37pm

Fucked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 9:37pm

Waffleman44's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Waffleman44's badges

Waffleman44's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother said he was cleaning his room. When I walked in, he was giving my cousin a blowjob. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2015 at 7:01pm / United States (West Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, a customer yelled, "I'll bash your fuckin' face in, cunt" at me at 9:30am because we don't serve the lunch menu at breakfast time. Yes, the 15-year-old girl in high school is responsible for McDonald's entire menu. FML

by McFuckYouTooCunt / 06/11/2015 at 9:44am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, my husband and I broke the news to my 10-year-old son that in about 8 months, he'll have a baby brother or sister. I knew he never wanted a sibling, but I didn't expect him to throw a tantrum, then look at me through teary eyes and scream, "Why can't you keep your fucking legs closed?" FML

by Anonymous / 06/10/2015 at 12:13pm / United States (Kentucky) / Kids

Today, the guy I made cookies for, spent hours getting ready for, and drove 3 hours in traffic to see never actually wanted me to come. When I knocked on his door, he opened it, but immediately closed it in my face. He then texted me saying, "I met someone else." FML

by Caligirl1996 / 06/09/2015 at 2:10am / United States (California) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my crackhead neighbour got slightly annoyed at my 2-day-old daughter's late-night wailing. Well, I think so, anyway, as she politely requested us to "SHUT THAT CUNT KID UP." or she would "BLOW BOTH OUR HOUSES UP, YOU FUCKING ASSFUCKS." But I'm not 100% sure. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2015 at 11:51pm / Australia / Kids

Today, some popped-collar wearing shitbird tried to pick me up with the line, "You look like Marilyn Monroe's corpse! Wanna fuck?" FML

by Anonymous / 02/20/2015 at 4:26pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I won a game of Monopoly against my girlfriend. She reacted by sweeping the board off the table, storming out the front door, and mowing down my mailbox driving away. FML

by Anonymous / 02/09/2015 at 3:42pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was chased out of my own house by my wife's lover's dog. FML

by Anonymous / 02/09/2015 at 9:53am / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals

Today, while shopping with my 6-year-old daughter, she said, "Mommy, remember you wanna get duck tape!" A middle-aged guy nearby scoffed and told her: "DUCT, not DUCK. Dumb cunt." I ended up having to drive my bawling daughter home with no shopping. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2015 at 2:16pm / Kids

Today, at Walmart, a crazy old woman bitched me out for being pregnant. She kept following me around, calling me a stupid teen slut and saying she hoped my baby died so I could live a "normal life". I'm 26 and just very short. FML

by Anonymous / 01/21/2015 at 9:34am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was fired for "smelling like garbage". I'm the guy who throws the garbage into the truck. FML

by Ajwc95 / 12/20/2014 at 4:25am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was shocked to notice that my hair has started growing out entirely silver, supposedly due to pregnancy. I'm 19. Apparently, according to my aunt, "It runs in the family." FML

by Anonymous / 12/19/2014 at 5:41am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, my mother-in-law asked for a copy of my son's death certificate so she could have her week-long island beach holiday classed as bereavement leave. FML

Today, my mom wouldn't let me go to the YMCA pool with the rest of the family. She said that the sound my thighs make when they rub together is "embarrassing". FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2014 at 2:07am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my vegan girlfriend openly admitted that she'd let me die if she had to choose between saving my life or an animal's. She actually seemed confused as to why that upset me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/13/2014 at 8:14pm / Australia (Victoria) / Love