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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52305) - you deserved it (13341)
On 03/08/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by squirty_joe (woman) - United States
I agree, your life sucks (70654) - you deserved it (9648)
On 03/02/2009 at 2:01pm - misc - by EPICfml. (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my mother got a call from our old high school saying that they had fifteen freshmen boys in his office with a nude photo of me on their phones. I had sent that photo only to my boyfriend. Apparently he loves to share me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22720) - you deserved it (67513)
On 03/01/2009 at 1:58am - intimacy - by fmlisthebomb (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22000) - you deserved it (76406)
On 02/28/2009 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by textfail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52887) - you deserved it (11424)
On 02/27/2009 at 3:39am - intimacy - by facepalm (woman) - Singapore
Today, I was teasing my boyfriend telling him that my butt was so much cuter than his and that at least mine wasn't smelly stinky or hairy. Then he said yeah, I just wish that your vag was the same way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14313) - you deserved it (47782)
On 02/26/2009 at 5:11pm - intimacy - by FMluck (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend masturbating so I said to her, "Need a hand with that?" to which she replied "I'm doing fine here on my own, don't ruin it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (72177) - you deserved it (16750)
On 02/23/2009 at 8:14am - intimacy - by Anonn (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I started a fight at a lesbian bar and lost. I'm a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11175) - you deserved it (62890)
On 02/15/2009 at 5:43am - misc - by Mofisto (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was browsing the internet and I found a picture of my girlfriend on uglypeople.com. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32146) - you deserved it (4646)
On 12/21/2008 at 8:44pm - intimacy - by HeatoN - Germany (Berlin)
Today, I heard my next door neighbour screaming as if someone's trying to slice her throat. Her window was open. Intrigued, I go onto my balcony and ask in a loud voice if everything's ok and if she needs anything. Her and her boyfriend shout back in unison: "We're F*ing, go away". FML
I agree, your life sucks (24767) - you deserved it (5308)
On 11/27/2008 at 3:52am - intimacy - by ehbe - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was performing the classic 69 position with my girlfriend. I wasn't able to control it : I farted right into her nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34297) - you deserved it (17010)
On 11/25/2008 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by USSEYL - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)
Today, when I woke up, my husband was already up. Thinking I hear him in the hall I shout out "come on, don't be shy, bring that cock in here right now!". A voice replies: "he's gone out to get some bread". It was my mother in law. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30726) - you deserved it (10246)
On 11/20/2008 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by Tinker-Bell - Sent from mobile version
Today, after making love to my girlfriend, I realised that the phone was on the bed and because of the movements, it called my dad by itself. It went to voicemail. My dad will soon have all the details. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26032) - you deserved it (5855)
On 11/20/2008 at 5:19am - intimacy - by Maxime - Sent from mobile version
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