ummm......
Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML
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On 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by dinosaurman (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my 118 year old house went from "family dwelling" to "official crime scene". 2 bodies were discovered under the cement in the basement when we began renovations on our new family home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37658) - you totally deserved it (1021)
On 09/24/2009 at 3:13pm - misc - by amory (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I learned that my anxious and obsessive mother is going to drive three hours every weekend to attend a Johns Hopkins medical course on stress reduction. Why is this bad? I just left home for college and have enjoyed my last two weeks of freedom without her around. I attend Johns Hopkins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23427) - you totally deserved it (1498)
On 09/15/2009 at 3:45pm - misc - by notcool - United States (Maryland)
Today, I told my mother that I'm pregnant. She went off screaming at me about how I shouldn't be having sex. I am 25 and have been happily married for 3 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15815) - you totally deserved it (686)
On 09/15/2009 at 5:58am - intimacy - by Confused (woman) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, at my wedding reception, my father began his speech with "Well, I never, ever thought that this day would come," at which point the entire room, including my new husband, broke into a round of enthusiastic applause. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27039) - you totally deserved it (2440)
On 08/08/2009 at 3:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was trying on some shoes when I felt the heels break underneath me. Not only did they cost two paychecks worth, but as I was leaving I heard the sales girl say that "we really should have a weight limit for who can try on our products." FML
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On 07/29/2009 at 12:03am - money - by BigFoot (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my son decided to come out of the closet by wearing a shirt that said "Mom, I'm gay" to the family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27257) - you totally deserved it (13534)
On 07/25/2009 at 5:14pm - kids - by Mom (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I learned that the four girls who I assumed were my girlfriends' good friends and whom she was always talking about were actually characters from the television show, "Sex and the City." My girlfriend has fictional friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35855) - you totally deserved it (3683)
On 07/23/2009 at 3:16pm - love - by tubedout (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was performing in the musical 'Cabaret'. I was playing a Nazi soldier, swastika armband and all. Someone thought it would be funny to take my real clothes while I was on stage. I had to walk a mile back my house with my costume on. Someone threw eggs at me. FML
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On 07/21/2009 at 8:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I came home from living in Spain for 2 years. My mom made dinner for me, and she had forgotten about my allergy to citrus, because she made lemon chicken. After using my EpiPen, and calling 911 for myself, I heard my mom say to my dad, "She always did have to be the center of attention." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42204) - you totally deserved it (1630)
On 07/21/2009 at 11:19am - health - by Lemonhead (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my wife is divorcing me because she wants to party more with her friends alone. One year ago, I followed her to Norway, where her family lives. I left my friends, family and job opportunities (which were very good) in order to live with her. Now I am shoveling shit on a horse farm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41030) - you totally deserved it (7003)
On 07/21/2009 at 8:03am - love - by person_r (man) - Norway (Vestfold)
Today, I was at the airport to catch a plane. It was very crowded at the gate and there was nowhere to sit except for a flat metal bench, so I sat on that. Turns out I was sitting on a luggage scale, so my weight was displayed for everybody to see. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11469) - you totally deserved it (27276)
On 07/21/2009 at 2:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I woke up screaming. Why? Well, I was complaining to my dad yesterday about how I always hit the snooze button and just roll over when my alarm goes off, and how that results in me being late for morning classes. My dad thought he'd help out by placing a mousetrap on the snooze button. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29080) - you totally deserved it (16450)
On 07/21/2009 at 1:38am - misc - by emperor (man) - Bangladesh (Dhaka)
Today, I finally told my parents I would be changing bedrooms because I could no longer stand hearing them having sex, which is awkward and disturbing. Later, my dad came and asked me quietly if I thought my mom sounded "satisfied." FML
I agree, your life sucks (58627) - you totally deserved it (3238)
On 07/21/2009 at 12:39am - intimacy - by fmjob (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, my boss asked me if I know anything about those tattoos that girl put on their lower backs. "You mean Tramp Stamps?" I responded. He looked at me with hatred in his eyes and said that his 18 year old daughter just got one. FML
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On 07/19/2009 at 3:25am - work - by Eh... (man) - Ukraine (Kyyivs'ka Oblast')
