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Volcan

Offline (the 10/25/2014 at 6:55pm) | Search for a member

Volcan

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11431
  • Number of comments : 66
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Volcan : Don't get excited, I am not an interesting person.
I'm a pre-med student. I like to play pieces by Satie on the piano.
I enjoy sunrise, eating indoors and short walks in the city.
I play a lot of video games and MMOs.
The picture is not me but rather Andy Warhol's lover. She was beautiful. Apparently I look like her.
It pisses me off when most girls call themselves nerds just for playing COD and Halo and maybe having a Link t-shirt.
I grew up with comic books, Star Wars, Star Trek, Isaac Asimov, Piers Anthony, and a healthy curiosity of human anatomy.

As I said, I am not interesting. I am peculiar.

Volcan's page activity

Visits<b>ermagherdaturdis</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 8:24am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 3:12pm<b>battlehamster</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 12:05pm<b>lifelikedat</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 7:13pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 1:52am<b>zandra2020</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 10:41pm<b>javiz0922</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 7:47pm<b>greekpride</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 1:44pm<b>pinkpig23</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 3:23pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 5:42pm<b>HeatherFeatherB</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 11:51pm<b>ItsMissLia</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 9:26pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 9:16pm<b>VivaLaColdplay</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 6:00pm<b>matthewj34</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 5:53pm<b>Flowtastic</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 4:17pm<b>PenguinBitch</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 3:41pm<b>baapii</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 3:07pm

Volcan's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Volcan's badges

Volcan's favorite FMLs

Today, my house was egged while I went out shopping. When I told my dad about it, he immediately and casually admitted to being the one who did it, asking, "You got a fucking problem with that, son?" I don't know if he's just messing with my head, or if he really did do it. FML

#20756478
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40408) - you deserved it (3306)

On 06/30/2013 at 6:08pm - misc - by thefuck (man) - Ireland (Cavan)

Today, I was explaining to my son that porn isn't a realistic depiction of sex. Just as I finished explaining to him that threesomes rarely happen in real life, he started crying. I feel like a dream-crushing monster. FML

#20756438
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48275) - you deserved it (9361)

On 06/30/2013 at 5:44pm - kids - by sorry, kiddo (man) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, what started off as an amazing date with my girlfriend ended with me driving her drunk ass home while she sat in the backseat making out with her new boyfriend. FML

Today, my crush kissed me for the first time. However, my hair was falling into my face and getting in the way. No problem, I wear a wig so without thinking, I simply removed it. I don't think he'll kiss me again anytime soon. FML

#20755685
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47403) - you deserved it (18270)

On 06/30/2013 at 6:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I heard my husband telling his friend that I used to be a skank and was "easier than 1 plus 1" when we first met. I was still a virgin when we got married. FML

Today, my husband and I were at the mall, and decided to have a snack at the food court. As we ate, an obese woman squeezed past our table, butt facing us. Just when her ass-cheeks slid past our heads, she let out a horrific fart that my father would be proud of. FML

#20755283
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48877) - you deserved it (3134)

On 06/30/2013 at 12:21am - misc - by whipplewhip - United States

Today, I overheard my dad telling my mum that the only way I'm ever going to get into a relationship is if I "pose as a woman and con some gullible bastard online." He's probably right. FML

#20754680
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40796) - you deserved it (4530)

On 06/29/2013 at 5:49pm - love - by cheerbabeXoXo (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, my girlfriend kicked me out for bringing up the idea of her maybe giving me a blowjob someday. According to her, it's "demeaning" and "sick". She doesn't seem to have a problem always making me go down on her for ages as a condition for having sex with me, though. FML

#20754518
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56441) - you deserved it (9076)

On 06/29/2013 at 3:58pm - intimacy - by patriarchal apparently (man) - Saint Lucia

Today, I was sitting at my favorite coffee shop, when a creepy 50-ish looking guy sat at my table. He asked if I'm into submissive guys, and if I wanted to dominate him. I'm a 17-year-old girl, and am now scared to ever go back there. FML

#20754256
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44343) - you deserved it (2625)

On 06/29/2013 at 1:18pm - misc - by perdix??? (woman) - Czech Republic

Today, a drunk driver drove his car through my mailbox. He got pissed, started yelling, and threatened to sue me for "putting the mailbox in the middle of the road". If my front lawn is a road, I'm going to have some serious issues. FML

#20754226
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40557) - you deserved it (2396)

On 06/29/2013 at 12:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my house was broken into. The burglar didn't steal my brand new laptop, iPad or TV. They instead made off with every single item of clothing I own. When I went to turn on my TV to try and distract myself from this, I found all of the cables in back missing. The police don't believe me. FML

#20753916
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47655) - you deserved it (2559)

On 06/29/2013 at 5:55am - misc - by Angry and Confused - United States (Nevada)

Today, It was my fiancé's 21st birthday party. It ended with him too drunk to walk and wailing about how much he misses an ex girlfriend of his that he dumped 4 years ago. FML

#20753850
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45757) - you deserved it (4589)

On 06/29/2013 at 4:02am - love - by bubblegum92 - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to change the language setting on my phone to Mandarin. Unfortunately, neither of us knows Mandarin, and we can't change it back to English. FML

#20753667
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40413) - you deserved it (8002)

On 06/29/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by damniphone - Canada (Alberta)

Today, a group of friends and I went out to a fancy club together. The doorman checked us out and let everyone in. Everyone except me, that is. The doorman's reason: "Her face looks like a baboon's arse." My "friends" all went in anyway, leaving me to walk all the way home. FML

#20753013
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48713) - you deserved it (4393)

On 06/28/2013 at 7:22pm - misc - by arse-face (woman) - Ireland (Clare)

Today, I had to remove a glass bottle, complete with an ineffective pullstring, from a patient's rectum. He claimed that he'd accidentally sat on it, and later threatened to sue me for every penny if I breathed a word of it to anyone. Oops, looks like I just did. FML

#20752893
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49858) - you deserved it (5739)

On 06/28/2013 at 5:59pm - work - by DocKreso (man) - Croatia (Splitsko-Dalmatinska)



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