Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Volcan

Offline (the 09/04/2015 at 2:03am) | Search for a member

Volcan

7Fucked!

Volcan
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 24 June 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 25390
  • Number of comments : 67
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Volcan : Don't get excited, I am not an interesting person.
I'm a pre-med student. I like to play pieces by Satie on the piano.
I enjoy sunrise, eating indoors and short walks in the city.
I play a lot of video games and MMOs.
The picture is not me but rather Andy Warhol's lover. She was beautiful. Apparently I look like her.
It pisses me off when most girls call themselves nerds just for playing COD and Halo and maybe having a Link t-shirt.
I grew up with comic books, Star Wars, Star Trek, Isaac Asimov, Piers Anthony, and a healthy curiosity of human anatomy.

As I said, I am not interesting. I am peculiar.

Volcan's page activity

Visits<b>molloy2</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 11:40pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 9:50pm<b>jengo54</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 9:30pm<b>bandaidstations</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 11:01pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 8:27pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 8:02am<b>JayL80</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 2:10am<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 5:55pm<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 4:43pm<b>Zoldyck</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 6:28pm<b>muhammed_ali</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 2:49pm<b>blazeitrabbit</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 7:56am<b>A07</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 2:59pm<b>Twisted_Killjoy</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 2:08pm<b>Thorzix</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 10:13pm<b>powerkeep</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 4:24pm<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 4:28am<b>cornyrob</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 12:22am

Fucked!<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 11:56pm<b>powerkeep</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 10:24pm<b>venomousflower</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 7:26pm<b>Casper___t</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 10:37am<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 3:20am<b>Maclaine21</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 6:10am

Volcan's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Volcan's badges

Volcan's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML

#15042917
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53340) - you deserved it (43526)

On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that to save on expenses, my wife booked a very small hotel room for ourselves and the kids while we visit Disney World. I've been officially cockblocked by Mickey Mouse. FML

#15029683
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36488) - you deserved it (8134)

On 02/18/2011 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by Disney - United States (Louisiana)

Today, it's my birthday. I was excited because of all the wall posts I got on Facebook. Then I saw I got a "Happy Birthday" from the girl my boyfriend cheated on me with. FML

#14988782
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35049) - you deserved it (7125)

On 02/15/2011 at 9:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML

#14961230
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46308) - you deserved it (9266)

On 02/13/2011 at 5:32pm - intimacy - by Katrina (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She's a sock puppet. FML

#14802825
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20550) - you deserved it (69384)

On 02/01/2011 at 9:32pm - intimacy - by seepeezy32 -

Today, I received a text message from my wife who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends: "Have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you tomorrow morning." His? FML

#14768786
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48531) - you deserved it (4327) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/30/2011 at 1:21am - love - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was having sex with a guy I met at my friend's party. He stopped mid-thrust, climbed off, and started talking about how nervous he is about buying his first car next week. FML

#14768541
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35879) - you deserved it (10553)

On 01/30/2011 at 1:07am - intimacy - by effingdoucher (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my husband and I are celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary. It's also the 5th anniversary of the last time he made me orgasm. FML

#14729815
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36073) - you deserved it (7102)

On 01/27/2011 at 8:07am - intimacy - by ohdear (woman) - United Kingdom (Bury)

Today, I called my ex boyfriend to tell him that not only am I still in love with him, I'm also three months pregnant with his child. Upon hearing the news, he swore, called me a pathetic liar, swore some more, and hung up on me. FML

#14651600
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35520) - you deserved it (15201)

On 01/20/2011 at 4:37pm - love - by Bethany (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I bleached my hair. Not only did it fry, it also has a very noticeable green tint and because of the damage, I can't dye it again for a while. Now I keep getting asked "Why so serious?" by my friends. FML

#14600579
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11491) - you deserved it (31273)

On 01/16/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Torbay)

Today, I came to the conclusion that you should always tell the truth. While I was busy reassuring her that the condom didn't break, she was telling me how it was okay because she was on the pill. According to the pregnancy test, we both lied. FML

#14585624
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13937) - you deserved it (51146)

On 01/15/2011 at 2:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to walk three miles home from work. Both my parents were at home. The reason they wouldn't collect me is apparently because I've "gotten so fat, your grandma cried after she saw you". FML

#14492583
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21174) - you deserved it (24750)

On 01/07/2011 at 12:46am - health - by biscuit (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, a kid grabbed the receiver to my cochlear implant and ran off with it. I went to a security guard, and, if my lip reading was accurate, he said to "try and make it through the day without it". Without it, I can't hear anything. FML

#14487466
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38200) - you deserved it (2343)

On 01/06/2011 at 5:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had a major falling out with my best friend. Angry, I sent a short text message to him explaining how I felt. I soon noticed I'd accidentally texted "I'm going to fucking kill you, asshole." to my boss instead. I'm still waiting on a reply. FML

#14415862
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9887) - you deserved it (38576)

On 12/31/2010 at 11:05pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, instead of watching a movie like a normal family, we performed random acts of kindness by handing out roses to total strangers in the freezing cold. No one would take them. FML

#14400512
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28762) - you deserved it (5915)

On 12/30/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: