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Volcan

Offline (the 10/25/2014 at 6:55pm) | Search for a member

Volcan

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 15841
  • Number of comments : 66
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Volcan : Don't get excited, I am not an interesting person.
I'm a pre-med student. I like to play pieces by Satie on the piano.
I enjoy sunrise, eating indoors and short walks in the city.
I play a lot of video games and MMOs.
The picture is not me but rather Andy Warhol's lover. She was beautiful. Apparently I look like her.
It pisses me off when most girls call themselves nerds just for playing COD and Halo and maybe having a Link t-shirt.
I grew up with comic books, Star Wars, Star Trek, Isaac Asimov, Piers Anthony, and a healthy curiosity of human anatomy.

As I said, I am not interesting. I am peculiar.

Volcan's page activity

Visits<b>johnrdz3</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 8:58am<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 10:55pm<b>coleh1998</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 2:24am<b>mschmuty</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 7:57am<b>brwolfie</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 3:13am<b>powerkeep</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 1:44pm<b>lilola97</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 5:30am<b>miianah1</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 9:50pm<b>hduebdo</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 6:31am<b>ermagherdaturdis</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 8:24am<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 3:12pm<b>battlehamster</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 12:05pm<b>lifelikedat</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 7:13pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 1:52am<b>zandra2020</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 10:41pm<b>javiz0922</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 7:47pm<b>greekpride</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 1:44pm<b>pinkpig23</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 3:23pm

Volcan's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Volcan's badges

Volcan's favorite FMLs

Today, I am six months pregnant and have been lactating. When I noticed this and pointed it out to my husband, I jokingly stated that I felt like a cow. He then replied. "Oh, you're not a cow. At most you're just a fat pig." He still has no clue why I'm upset. FML

#19504672
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24734) - you deserved it (4413)

On 04/21/2012 at 2:15am - misc - by wmkaz - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I blurted out something like "humdidumdum erm lalala" in public, attracting mystified stares. The thing is, I do this every time I remember something embarrassing I've said or done in the past, in an attempt to erase it out of my consciousness. So it happens a lot. FML

#19499543
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16620) - you deserved it (9137)

On 04/20/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by Ashamed (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after years of waiting, I finally got to meet the band whose music got me through one of the hardest times I have ever experienced. When I turned down the lead singer for sex, they told me to leave. FML

#19470804
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32648) - you deserved it (12491)

On 04/15/2012 at 3:03am - intimacy - by bummed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after years of waiting, I finally got to meet the band whose music got me through one of the hardest times I have ever experienced. When I turned down the lead singer for sex, they told me to leave. FML

#19470804
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32648) - you deserved it (12491)

On 04/15/2012 at 3:03am - intimacy - by bummed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
585 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13766) - you deserved it (55367) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, a guy asked me why I'm single. As a joke, I told him that not only do I have a penis, but that it's so large that most men are intimidated by it. He wasn't impressed. And I actually wonder why I'm single. FML

#19460491
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10365) - you deserved it (27214)

On 04/13/2012 at 9:11am - intimacy - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, my wife and I decided to try role-playing. I started cleaning the pool. waiting for her to come out and be sexy, but she never did. I'd cleaned the entire pool before going into the house to ask why she never came out. She said she tricked me into cleaning the pool. FML

#19455819
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30830) - you deserved it (19880)

On 04/12/2012 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by CantPublish - United States (California)

Today, I met a guy while out with some friends. He kept blowing up his cheeks, so I did it back to him and asked him why he did it. He pulled out a card from his wallet and pointed at it. It was a card saying he may have speech or facial difficulties because he had a stroke when he was 12. FML

#19454925
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24036) - you deserved it (12752)

On 04/12/2012 at 9:47am - misc - by Holls (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I met a guy while out with some friends. He kept blowing up his cheeks, so I did it back to him and asked him why he did it. He pulled out a card from his wallet and pointed at it. It was a card saying he may have speech or facial difficulties because he had a stroke when he was 12. FML

#19454925
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24036) - you deserved it (12752)

On 04/12/2012 at 9:47am - misc - by Holls (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML

#19453436
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18360) - you deserved it (47584)

On 04/12/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by girly (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got home to find our house broken into. Among other things, the thieves took our television, my laptop and several pieces of expensive jewelry. Also missing was my daughter's My Little Pony collection. I think we were robbed by a Brony. FML

#19450814
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23901) - you deserved it (1879)

On 04/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got home to find our house broken into. Among other things, the thieves took our television, my laptop and several pieces of expensive jewelry. Also missing was my daughter's My Little Pony collection. I think we were robbed by a Brony. FML

#19450814
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23901) - you deserved it (1879)

On 04/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML

#19450302
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9539) - you deserved it (33432)

On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)

Today, while lying in bed, I heard a strange grating noise coming from the hallway. After recovering from my initial assumption that it was a poltergeist come to murder me and steal my liver, I went out to investigate. It was there that I discovered my bulldog casually eating into the wall. FML

Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything was going great until I got a concussion. My dog thought that it would be fun to headbutt me from a running start. Twice. FML

#19440536
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20683) - you deserved it (2437)

On 04/09/2012 at 11:50pm - animals - by Lee (woman) - United States



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