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Volcan

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Volcan
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4680
  • Number of comments : 61
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About Volcan : Don't get excited, I am not an interesting person.
I'm a pre-med student. I like to play pieces by Satie on the piano.
I enjoy sunrise, eating indoors and short walks in the city.
I play a lot of video games and MMOs.
The picture is not me but rather Andy Warhol's lover. She was beautiful. Apparently I look like her.
It pisses me off when most girls call themselves nerds just for playing COD and Halo and maybe having a Link t-shirt.
I grew up with comic books, Star Wars, Star Trek, Isaac Asimov, Piers Anthony, and a healthy curiosity of human anatomy.

As I said, I am not interesting. I am peculiar.

Volcan's last visitors

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Volcan's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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Volcan's favorite FMLs

Today, after waking up, I went into the kitchen and took a swig of milk from the carton. I overestimated my strength, and the whole thing splashed all over my face. A few moments later, my dad staggered in, looked at me in disgust, and said, "You know what? I don't even wanna know." FML

#20000538
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15185) - you deserved it (9135)

On 08/03/2012 at 3:28pm - misc - by squeltorey (man) - United States (California)

Today, after spending five years regaining contact with my estranged father, I finally met him. I tearfully dropped my luggage and ran to hug him. He belched and told me to get in the car, because he had diarrhea. FML

#19997087
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18091) - you deserved it (1734)

On 08/01/2012 at 8:06pm - love - by daddydaughterWTF - United States (Florida)

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52255) - you deserved it (9697)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I was upset over a recent break up. It showed while I was at work, and I made a customer sad just by looking blue. She complained to my manager. I got written up for being so depressed that I got a customer depressed too. FML

#19993921
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16183) - you deserved it (2064)

On 07/31/2012 at 2:42am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to find my cat has gone into heat. Her favorite thing to do right now is sticking her ass in my face and howling like a Nazgûl. FML

#19992743
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18095) - you deserved it (3863)

On 07/30/2012 at 2:05pm - animals - by soph511 (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I went to a corner store to re-stock my chocolate stash. A guy from work walked in to see me and the cashier arguing about the amount of candy I was trying to buy with a jar of pennies. He took one look at me and said, "That time of the month, eh?" FML

#19992100
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8347) - you deserved it (21123)

On 07/30/2012 at 2:59am - misc - by fmlgrl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to dinner with an amazing guy. At the end he said he had to go to the washroom. 15 min later he was still MIA, so I figured he'd ditched me with the bill. I paid and left. 10 min later he texted me, asking where I was. Turns out he hadn't ditched me. He was having "stomach issues." FML

#19991371
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22174) - you deserved it (5864)

On 07/29/2012 at 8:25pm - misc - by oops (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my husband if he knew what day it was. His answer was, "garbage day?" It's our six-year anniversary. FML

#19987123
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19120) - you deserved it (2778)

On 07/27/2012 at 10:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35711) - you deserved it (7805)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, against my advice, my boyfriend decided to read Fifty Shades of Grey in an attempt to learn how to please me in bed. Now all he does is suck on my toes, and thinks it's weird that I don't spontaneously orgasm as if I'm some kind of nymphomaniacal weirdo. FML

#19979806
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30590) - you deserved it (4605)

On 07/23/2012 at 3:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I found my husband's journal, and along with it the real reason he took so long to show up to our wedding rehearsals last year. According to the journal, it was because he was too busy wooing a married mother of five and sticking his "slut-banger all up in that fat booty." FML

#19965581
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23854) - you deserved it (2367)

On 07/20/2012 at 10:12pm - misc - by divorce? i think so (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend thought it appropriate to let me know that doing the "duck face" in my Facebook pictures "highlights my mustache." FML

#19951439
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5955) - you deserved it (49272)

On 07/17/2012 at 7:30pm - love - by mustachio101 (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my mom came over to me and whispered something in my ear. I didn't hear it and assumed it was a joke, so I started laughing. Turns out my aunt died. FML

#19939490
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9209) - you deserved it (22285)

On 07/15/2012 at 1:02am - misc - by RIP - United States

Today, I realized my boyfriend uses sex as a way to get me to stop talking. FML

#19936379
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10781) - you deserved it (25896)

On 07/14/2012 at 7:15am - intimacy - by zstarr - United States (Georgia)



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