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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, a very attractive man asked me out. I'd have been flattered if I weren't the nurse assigned to his laboring wife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18825) - you deserved it (1092)
On 09/24/2012 at 12:32am - misc - by Hello Nurse (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17427) - you deserved it (1859)
On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17267) - you deserved it (1257)
On 09/14/2012 at 12:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my dad wants me to spray a wasp nest, because I'm the fittest family member and can run the fastest. The wasps are already angry, and I'm allergic to them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18335) - you deserved it (1037)
On 09/01/2012 at 10:09am - health - by iliveintexas - United States (Texas)
Today, at work, I decided to make things more interesting, so when I called people I used a fake accent. As I was using an Australian accent, the person I was talking to asked me where in Australia I was from. I desperately replied, "Where the kangaroos are..." I'm now jobless. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4254) - you deserved it (22662)
On 08/09/2012 at 5:42pm - work - by sincerely depressed. - United States (California)
Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23828) - you deserved it (10241)
On 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by unicorn - United States (Georgia)
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex for the first time. While we were undressing each other, he said, "Wow, if we have children, you're gonna have to shave, or they'll die from rug-burn as they come out!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28555) - you deserved it (20844)
On 10/30/2010 at 8:37pm - intimacy - by tht1chk - United States (California)
Today, it was the first day of astronomy class and we all waited for the professor to enter the classroom. All of a sudden, someone turns the lights off, it's pitch black, and we hear the professor saying, "Greetings earthlings..." It's going to be a long semester. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16469) - you deserved it (13519)
On 09/16/2010 at 2:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I have both a cold and a period. Tomorrow, I will have a cold, my period and my wisdom teeth taken out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38722) - you deserved it (2519)
On 05/23/2010 at 8:22pm - misc - by Unlucky (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was at the dentist getting a cavity filled. As she's drilling into my tooth, I feel the drill slip, and then she quickly stuffs gauze into my mouth. She nervously laughs and says to me "Wow! You must really be numb!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (123546) - you deserved it (3842)
On 03/06/2009 at 5:20pm - health - by Noname (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Monday 17 June 2013
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