About VerpissDich : 19 years old, double-majoring in mathematics and linguistics... I like fencing, men in uniform, dogs, action movies, Hetalia, SNK, and I have no idea what else to write here.
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VerpissDich's favorite FMLs
Today, my dad and I got into an argument. When I was proven wrong, he said, "Good job, genius." I shot back the first thing that popped into my head, which was "I am not a genius!" He laughed and says that if I die before him, he's having that engraved on my tombstone. FML
by Anonymous / 04/25/2014 at 5:42pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML
by not getting laid / 10/13/2013 at 10:38am / United States (Texas) / Love
by those_allergies / 05/12/2013 at 1:20am / United States (Oregon) / Health
by Bullocks / 04/27/2012 at 1:49am / United States (New York) / Work
by ohno / 12/01/2011 at 9:38am / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, I went to see my guidance counselor. I was supposed to hear from my college about a scholarship by October 3rd. I was worried since it was already the 2nd so I went to talk to her. She never turned in my nomination. Goodbye $80,000 scholarship. FML
by Screwed / 10/03/2009 at 12:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
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- Today, my boyfriend told me that he believes getting kicked in the balls is a scientifically-proven… Today, I was going down on my boyfriend when he stood up on the bed to get a different experience.… Today, I heard what sounded like high-pitched feminine moaning coming from my son's room. I knocked…